Frozen X Hetalia!

Part 4

   Prussia trudges up the lonely mountain side, his boots sinking into the freshly fallen snow. It's dark out, and snow clouds hide the moon and stars. He begins singing:
"It's cold up here on the mountain tonight
And I can't see anything
I should turn on my flashlight,
But I guess I'm gonna sing
The wind is howling like this swirling storm inside
Couldn't keep it in, heaven knows I tried!"
He balls his hands into fists, growing stern with himself.
"Don't let tears out, stop your whining
Be the strong guy you always have to be
Shut up, don't think, don't remember
Well, now I do!"
He jerks his other glove off his hand.
"I'm awesome, I'm awesome
Can't hold it back anymore
I'm awesome, I'm awesome
What was I hiding it for!?"
He lets his powers flow freely with his movements while he sings, relaxing with relief like he had just peed after hours of holding it.
"Don't give craps
What they're going to say
Let the war rage on,
Being alone never bothered me anyway!"
With one flick of his hand, he took off his cape and let it go into the wind. He continues up the mountain side, strutting like a fashion model.
"It's funny how some coolness
Makes everyone seem weak
And now I know that it's myself
That they will never beat!"
He runs up to a cliff ledge and creates and ice bridge, then continues running up it.
"Watch the awesome things I can do
My strength surpasses all of you
I'll do whatever they heck I choose
Screw you!
I'm awesome, I'm awesome
I am one with the birds in the sky
I'm awesome, I'm awesome
You'll never see me cry!"
He puts his foot down and creates a smooth, floor-like place.
"I claim this land
And here I'll invade
Let the war rage on!"
He raises his hands, and more ice crystals rise around him, taking the form of a fort.
"My hands will soon hold the maps of the whole world
All the vital regions will be mine one day—yes I'm sure!
And they'll bow when they see my awesomeness at last
I'm never going back,
Those losers can suck it!"
As he sings the last lines, he rips the little crown that's now too lame for him off his head. Heck, he just gives himself a whole new make-over—messing up his slicked-back hair, changing his dark colored suit into a white and blue coat with a superman cape, and a big ice-crown on his head.
"I'm awesome, I'm awesome
Unlike the ending of Breaking Dawn
I'm awesome, I'm awesome
I will grow freaking tall!"
He goes out onto his balcony where early morning sunlight is streaming in through the windows.
"Here I stand
On this cool balcony
Let the war rage on,
Being alone never bothered me anyway!"
*slam*
...
Germany trots through the frozen forest on his horse. "Prussia!" he calls. "Bruder! I have wrust and beer! It's warm! Not the beer, the wrust... I know warm beer isn't good so..." he sighs. "You're probably nowhere near and I'm talking to myself. At least I have my stick—" suddenly, the horse rears up and threw him off into the snow. It was a somewhat soft landing, but the horse runs off with his only food and "STICK!"
And so Germany was alone. Luckily, after only a few minutes of walking, he sees smoke curling out of a chimney in the distance. After following it, he comes to a cozy-looking log cabin.
Germany enters the door. He is immediately greeted by a large man with ashy blonde hair standing behind the counter. "Hello there!"
"Um, hallo..." Germany replies somewhat nervously. Even though the man seemed friendly enough, he couldn't help but feel that he just walked right into a creepy woods killer's house or something. "Have you seen my brother come through here? He's albino, red eyes, sorta the king..."
"I'm sorry, I haven't," Russia replies. "You look awful cold. Can I offer you some vodka?"
"No, that's okay, I had a lot of beer. But do you have boots and winter clothes?"
"Da, it's right over there in the winter department!" he points to a pitifully small pile of leftover clothes from two seasons ago. But luckily, they seem they would fit him, even though they were a bit strange for men's attire—bright colors, cutesy designs, etc.
"Danke," Germany says as Russia rings up his purchase at the counter.
Suddenly, the door flies open and a new figure enters. His clothes are covered in snow so thick that he might have scared them into thinking he was the abominable snow man! ...That is, if he wasn't so small and adorable.
"Excuse me sir," he runs up to the counter after throwing his hood off. "Do you have any tomatoes?"
"Sure, they're the last ones in stock!" Russia sets them on the counter. Italy grabs one eagerly and takes a bite. He reaches into his pockets to pay, but to his horror, they're empty.
"Oh no, I'm still broke... I've had no luck with the pasta mining business..."
"Pasta mining business?" Germany asks.
"Yes!" Italy grins. "Grandpa Rome told me that somewhere in these mountains, there's a magical pasta tunnel! I've been looking for it forever!"
"Really? You've been around the mountain?" Germany's eyebrows raise. "So then, have you seen my brother? He ran away from home..."
"If he's the man with white hair and red eyes, then yes! He was real nice! He said he was going to the summit! I gave him directions! Anyway, when I find the magical pasta tunnel, I'm gonna eat it and sell it and be happy forever! But for now... I still have no money..." his smile melts as his hands fall sorrowfully to his sides.
A purple aura of scariness appears behind Russia's head, but his smile stays. "If you do not pay for the tomatoes, then I will throw in a free trip to the sauna!" They look to a door just beside the counter where several figures stand in the window banging on it and begging for help.
"Help us!" the Baltics cry in unison. "We've been in here for months!"
"Seriously what did I ever do to you!?" China yells.
"Why won't you let me out big brother, so we can get married!?" Belarus growls, scraping at the wooden door.
"I personally think it's nice in here!" Ukraine calls from the background.
"She's the only one who wants to be in there," Russia explains. "As for the others, well... some I keep for fun and one is just too scary to let out."
Italy's eyes widen as sweat runs down his forehead, even though he's covered in frost. Germany's eyes fill with pity looking at the poor fool. Of course, it was his own fault for believing such a story, but he looked so sad.
"It's alright, I'll pay for the tomatoes..." Germany tells them.
"Aw, but I like throwing people into the sauna..." Russia slumped.
"Really!?" Italy gasps. "Oh, gratsi!" he tried to throw his arms around Germany, but was stopped by a hand on his face.
"On one condition only, though! You take me up the mountain to my brother!"
"Okay," Italy mumbles beneath the pressure of Germany's palm. He takes it off. "So I guess that means we're traveling buddies now! I'll go take a nap then we can get on our way first thing in the morning!"
"My brother could be dead by then!" Germany shouts. "We leave now!"
...
So Italy hitched up Romano to the sled, who was none too happy about sacrificing his siesta.
"...And then he just ran out and I suppose he accidently froze the entire kingdom on the way..."
"You tried to replace him as a brother!?" Italy gasps.
"Ja," Germany sighs. "And I know I was a jerk for doing it, but I really didn't think he'd care that much... he didn't seem to care in the past."
"But the way it looks, it looks like he cares an awful lot about you! I know because my big brother France taught me all about brotherhood! And he says brothers have a certain bond that doesn't compare to any other in the world!"
"Ja," Germany looks down. "I just want to apologize to him..." he trails off as he sees the GPS. "You're going the wrong way, you know."
"Oh, ya," Italy says. "This way's better. I don't ever trust the—"
"No, it's better to obey the GPS! It knows what it's doing!" Germany shouts, taking the reins from Italy.
"Wait, don't go that way, there's a deto—"
"It SAYS to go this way!"
"THERE'S A CLIFF AHEAD!"
"OBEY THE GPS!"
Suddenly, the sled runs off the cliff. It flings them over to the other side, but the sled falls into the icy abyss.
The two pick themselves up slowly and brush off, rubbing their aching spots.
"You have a thing for following directions blindly, don't you?" Italy mumbles.
"What?"
"Nothing..."
Romano pops out of the snow and shakes ice crystals off his fur. "Romano!" Italy cries, throwing his arms around his neck. "You're okay!"
"NO I'M NOT YOU STUPID SON OF A *****! I HATE THAT **** POTATO *******! THROW HIM OF THE EDGE ******* CLIFF!"
Romano begins brushing up against Germany as if trying to push him.
"Aw I think he likes you!" Italy grins. "Anyway, it's alright. I have a feeling I find the pasta cave soon, and then I can buy 20 sleds! Let's just continue on foot. We can still get to the top of the mountain by the end of the day!"
...