I can't believe we kissed before our date. This isn't me. I'm not like this. I just met the guy and most of the time I've known him he was laid up in a hospital bed. But I can't help it. Something about him..I just love it. He's a little broken and he plays it out as a joke..and that he's okay. I can tell he cares more about others than himself. I mean, look at his eyes. His warm, hazel eyes. He wants to save the world, but he doesn't seem to understand that in order to save it, he has to save himself. Maybe he just needs a little help.. Maybe I can be his little hero... Oh who am I kidding.. I got him hit by a speeding taxi. But he seems like he's never felt so alive...
"You okay, darling?"
He's so gentle and caring...he melts me..
Before he could catch on to me pondering on the idea that I might be falling for him already, I punched his arm jokingly. The one that's not broken of course.
"I'm fine, silly bunny."
What the heck did I just say?
"Uh..bunny?" he laughed charmingly.
"Well...you are adorable after all."
Nice save.
"Nah, but I'm glad I got you fooled."
He laughed before coming to a dead hault in front of this fancy-looking restaurant.
"Dinner, my lady?" he asked with a wink and a killer smile.
I smiled and kissed his cheek.
"Sounds lovely. "
He opened the door and I walked in. The place was huge. Candles were on every table. The tablecloths were beautiful. The atmosphere was comfy, and the dim lights were perfect to set the mood. There was only two other couples there. It was around 5:00 and the "dinner crowd" wasn't out yet. We were seated by some old dude. He had this odd accent that made Alex and I giggle. It didn't take long for us to order our food. We talked and laughed and ate and he reached for my hand more than once. Every time he did, I felt my heart race and I melted. His smile was reassuring and soothing. He wasn't like the others. He was genuine. Alexander was basically the male version of me, a little better actually. We connected more on this one date than I ever thought possible.
Impressive.
When we were ready to leave, I was a bit upset. I thought about how I simply went on this date because I felt guilty. I wasn't expecting to see him again. Now, I wanted to see him for the rest of my short life. In any case, I was too focused on my career to be involved with anyone. Especially someone who distracted me as much as he did. He was perfect. He was everything I could have asked for.
Look at him. He's so beautiful. But I'm sure as hell not risking to throw away my career over him. He's lovely. He's too perfect. I can't risk getting close to him and getting my heart destroyed more than it already is. Again. The last time that happened, I got addicted to drugs, lost my job, and became homeless and shortened my life span. All over a complete jerk. Alex will change. They all do. Ugh... Alex why... Or I don't know maybe not..
He walked me home after our beautiful night we shared. He held my hand the entire way. I felt both happiness and pain by it.
"See you again?"
There's that smile.
I smiled and told him, "Of course. "
Before I fell for him any harder, I went inside.
I went to bed. Funny how I thought I would have been able to sleep...
