Nobody Said It Was Easy

Copyright © 2013 Stephanee

All rights reserved.

COPYRIGHT: This Story, Nobody Said It Was Easy, all chapters, prologues/epilogues and associated content is copyrighted under the Copyright Act 1994. All rights are reserved by the owner, X_MyWinterFirefly_X (Stephanee) , and any unauthorised copying, broadcasting, manipulation, or selling of this work without the prior written permission of the copyright owner constitutes as an infringement of copyright. Any infringement of this copyright is punishable by law.

Punishments include but are not limited to a fine of up to $15,000

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"The moment of impact. The moment of impact proves potential for change. Has ripple effects far beyong what we can predict. Sending some particles crashing together. Making them closer than before. While sending others off into great ventures. Landing them where you've never thought you've found them. That's the thing about moments like these. You can't, no matter how hard you try, controlling how it's gonna affect you. You just gotta let the colliding parts go where they may. And wait. For the next collision"  -The Vow

In everyone's life there is always that one defining moment of impact that changes who you are completely. That moment that shatters your world into a mozaic of a million pieces faster than you can put it back together. In this moment you lose who you are completely, it changes everything you have ever believed in. And the harsh reality of it all is the fact that you only have two choices and neither are the easy way out.

Option one, you spend years and years of your life running from it and concealing the shatters with lies upon lies until you're too far gone from reality to look back. No escape. No freedom. Just the suffocating feeling of the walls closing in on you because of that one white lie that continued escalating into something more each time. 

Option two, you can choose to move on to better things. Or maybe it isn't that at all. Maybe it's learning to accept the reality of it and choosing to take it with you. Bearing the shatters of impact and living by its exceptions. To do this would be a hell of an experience, it doesn't make sense. But isn't that what makes the experience all worthwhile? Not knowing where you're headed, just following the journey where it leads you. And maybe, just maybe, you'd find that someone you're willing to break free of all limitations. That one person that changes your whole life for the better.

Unfortunately, I couldn't tell you what decision I made. That judgement is up to you. The true measures of my story couldn't be described in a few short sentences so I'm going to take you back to the start, where it all began.

Attraction: A quality or feature of something or someone that evokes interest, liking or desire.

It wasn't the money or the worldwide fame that attracted me to him, I could care less about his status or how many millions he had on him. It wasn't his boyband best-friends either. It was simply him. The way he looked so carefree when he smiled. His lips would curve up into a big grin reaching his eyes making them crinkle at the corners and the blue depths glisten brightly. Upon meeting him he made some lame joke and looked around awkwardly. He was just so different. He was himself. 

It wasn't love at first sight. It was mere infatuation when I first met him. Maybe that's what attracted me to him. I liked the fact that I didn't fall in love with him as we met eyes, my knees didn't wobble as we held eye contact and I didn't stutter as we talked. I was comfortable around him and he was worth a second thought before anything became permanent, simply because nothing is permanent - nothing lasts forever. Maybe I should have told myself that- should've told my heart that, when it all came crashing down. It was probably better if I didn't etch his name out on my heart, I did it anyway. I couldn't help myself. I let myself fall in the end and in the back of my mind I knew it wasn't permanent. It shouldn't have been permanent, but that didn't mean we couldn't create our own kind of forever, with the exception of detours along the way.

I remember someone telling me one day "Sometimes you have to learn to let go, to walk away, and maybe - just maybe if it's worth sacrificing everything you'll find a road back to each other. Even if it meant laying down the gravel yourselves." That was one of the best pieces of advice I could have ever gotten. Knowing us we wouldn't choose the simple way, that was most likely my doing. My past experiences held much weight in my decisions and I had to know for sure if what we had was worth fighting for. 

In the end it was worth it. Our love was worth it. He was worth it, and I'd do it all again.

This is my story of that moment that left my life in ruins. This is my story about that cliche kind of toe-curling, heart-racing love. This is my story of heartbreak. This is my story, my version of events.