Twas the night before christmas (Dan and Phil Edition)

Twas the night before christmas

Twas the night before Christmas (Dan and Phil edition)

Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the apartment

Dan Howell was in the kitchen, by the chocolate compartment.

The laptops were sat on the sofa with care,

As they laughed at their blogs that they both loved to share.

Dil Howlter in his clown suit lay still in his bed,

While visions of Tabitha danced through his head.

Phil in his pyjamas and Dan dressed in black

Laughed over a picture of old saint Barack.

When out in the street there arose a great clatter,

They ceased all their fun to see what was the matter.

Over to the curtains they flew with a gasp

And open they threw them as quick as a flash

The moon shining down on the two men below

Cast light round the room and the butt chair did glow

Before their eyes appeared the portal of legend

To which they sat down, feeling puzzled and threatened

They stepped up inside, seeing flashes of their past

And delved into memories of cooking and sass.

Phil is not on fires and AmazingDan's a plenty

Their followers growing by many and many

Now Howlter! Now, Delia! Now Rave Tree and Roaring

On Videos! On, Radio! On, Writing and Touring

From the first of the first, to the dark crisis hall.

Past, fly away, fly away, fly away all!

And then in a twinkling they heard on the roof

The stomping and stamping of each heavy boot

As both of the men turned around to each other

Down out the Chimney shot North West and her mother!

Kanye spoke not a word, but went down straight to work

And filled up the stockings with houseplants and merch.

He gave a satisfied nod and scrunched up his nose

And at last feeling happy up the chimney he rose.

He sprang on his sleigh; to his team he gave a whistle,

And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.

But they heard him exclaim 'ere he drove out of sight,

' I'll run for president in 2020, so I wish you goodnight.'