Ways To Help You Stop Self Hate

5 steps to be self harm free

        'STEP 1" which is moratorium it's most likely where you're at you self-harm and don't plan to stop.

Self harm, while it can relieve difficult emotions, is ultimately not a healthy coping mechanism for dealing with your feelings. It prevents you from constructively recognizing and finding solutions to the problems you're facing by giving you a temporary hit which allows you to ignore the upsetting emotions. Self harm can also be dangerous to you, you could cause yourself serious injury or even risk death. It's also upsetting to those around you, people who love you and are seeing you hurt yourself.

Once your aware of that you can move on to 'STEP 2" which is awareness; your aware that this is bad and you shouldn't harm yourself any longer

Because cutting and other means of self-harm tend to be taboo subjects, the people around you—and possibly even you—may harbor serious misconceptions about your motivations and state of mind. Don't let these myths get in the way of getting help or helping someone you care about.

Myth: People who cut and self-injure are trying to get attention.
Fact: The painful truth is that people who self-harm generally do so in secret. They aren't trying to manipulate others or draw attention to themselves. In fact, shame and fear can make it very difficult to come forward and ask for help.

Myth: People who self-injure are crazy and/or dangerous.
Fact: It is true that many people who self-harm suffer from anxiety, depression, or a previous trauma—just like millions of others in the general population. Self-injury is how they cope. Slapping them with a "crazy" or "dangerous" label isn't accurate or helpful.

Myth: People who self-injure want to die.
Fact: Self-injurers usually do not want to die. When they self-harm, they are not trying to kill themselves—they are trying to cope with their pain. In fact, self-injury may be a way of helping themselves go on living. However, in the long-term, people who self-injure have a much higher risk of suicide, which is why it's so important to seek help.

Myth: If the wounds aren't bad, it's not that serious.
Fact: The severity of a person's wounds has very little to do with how much he or she may be suffering. Don't assume that because the wounds or injuries are minor, there's nothing to worry about. 

       Now that you aware you can move on to 'STEP 3' which is preparation. Starting to recover (throw out your sharp objects, tell somebody, go to a facility which could help etc.) can be hard but it's necessary to start your recovery. This is where many self-harmers will turn back and start over at moratorium due to scars, isolation, guilt, not a long-term solution etc. But I have faith that you can do it  ^_^

If you self-harm to express pain and intense emotions

-Paint, draw, or scribble on a big piece of paper with red ink

-Express your feelings in a journal

-Compose a poem or song to say what you feel

-Write down any negative feelings and then rip the paper up

-Listen to music that expresses what you're feeling

If you self-harm to calm and soothe yourself

-Take a bath or hot shower

-Pet or cuddle with a dog or cat

-Wrap yourself in a warm blanket

-Massage your neck, hands, and feet

-Listen to calming music

If you self-harm because you feel disconnected and numb

-Call a friend (you don't have to talk about self-harm)Take a cold shower

-Hold an ice cube in the crook of your arm or leg

-Chew something with a very strong taste, like chili peppers, peppermint, or a grapefruit peel

-Go online to a self-help website, chat room, or message board

If you self-harm to release tension or vent anger

-Exercise vigorously—run, dance, jump rope, or hit a punching bag

-Punch a cushion or mattress or scream into your pillow

-Squeeze a stress ball or squish Play-Doh or clay

-Rip something up (sheets of paper, a magazine(not you skin))

-Make some noise (play an instrument, bang on pots and pans)

        If you've made it this far don't turn back now you're almost better. 'STEP 4' is rebuilding which is basically stopping it all together (relapsing is normal just try again). Keep track of your recovery so you can feel optimistic or like you achieved something. For example if you stop harming yourself on February 12th and its currently May 12th and your still clean wake up and say "FUCK YEA 3 MONTHS CLEAN IMA GET CAKE TODAY!" It's perfectly okay ....... I mean who doesn't want to eat cake?. *someone coughs in the background* nobody? *cricket chirps*okay then ...... Back to you

 The common link to abstain from self-injury in most self-harm cases is the need for consistent, relationship-oriented support, nurturance and guidance from a loved one to fight the constant struggle with the desire to harm one's own body I still think cake is a better suggestion. In case you need someone to talk to when no one's around or just start talking to a random stranger like on Omegle of course enter the wrong key words and you'll just be talking to a bunch of dicks ......... literally no joke literal penis's but find a decent person and start talking (it doesn't have to be about self-harm)  I suggest for a common interest keyword you enter a hobby or favorite band ya'know.

If you're not sure where to turn, call the S.A.F.E. Alternatives information line in the U.S. at (800) 366-8288 for referrals and support for cutting and self-harm.

'STEP 4' is stability which is staying clean. Usually the 1 year mark is when your considered "clean". So once a year has past your less likely to self harm but that requires you go through a years worth what made you harm yourself and that is also where many people go back to moratorium aka 'STEP 1' (for a list of what you can be doing instead of cutting scroll up to 'Step 3') 

AND YOUR AT 'STEP 5' which is secure and if you get to this point I'm so so so so proud of you you've made it to where most self-harmers (including I, yes I know hypocritical but I'm sorta working on it)  haven't been before you must feel proud now because you're at this point 5 years without self harm and HIGHLY UNLIKELY to start again your most likely no longer taunted by sharp object and can probably even trust yourself with sharp objects again. Your body no longer aches or craves to be injured and if you still have scars wear them proudly because they represent your stronger than labels, words, and/or urges and that another battle you have won :)