Soul Fire: Fight or Flight

Chapter 2

     Ethan never felt like his mind was truly resting. Even in the shower he was worrying about his birthday. There was nothing he could do, it was coming whether he liked it or not. It felt like something of a prison sentence. He spent so much time trying to hide from everyone that the thought of being so exposed terrified him.
     The hot water turned Ethan's pale skin red and dampened his brown curls to his head as he stood under the spray. He looked down at his own body. It wasn't too skinny, but he didn't really have any muscle to him. He wasn't awful to look at. His skin wasn't freckled like his dad's had been. Ethan took after his mom: smooth as silk and spotless of hair or blemish, aside from the bruises from Matt.
     Ethan loathed running into Matthew and Desmond. Matthew always got so rough and left purple patches of pain everywhere. He swore the guy got off on knowing Ethan was walking around with those on his skin. Desmond just glared at him like his gaze could set Ethan on fire and make him disappear.
     He never touched Ethan, though, not unless he had gotten into it with his dad. Then it got physical. He wasn't the only target they had, he'd seen Desmond go berserk a few times on other people. But whenever there had been a fight in the Vera household Carly was never too far behind him.
     Carly Vera was head of the cheerleading squad. They made finals every year but never won State. Probably didn't help that the captain spent half her free time trailing after her brother. She cared deeply for Desmond, though he could never understand why. Ethan figured it was a sibling thing; he was an only child so it didn't register with him all that clearly.
     Ethan hopped out of the shower and dried himself off. Grabbing a pair of boxers, some sweatpants, and a t-shirt, he padded down the stairs to the sound of pots boiling and a pan that was frying torillas. Auntie Marie regarded him with a critical eye.
     "So, how was school today?" She prodded.
     "It was fine, same as always," Ethan mumbled. He didn't want her to pry.
     "Well, that's good," Auntie Marie smiled. Ethan was immediately curious. She never small talked unless something was on her mind.
     "How was your day?" Ethan tried, but Marie only nodded her head. Now he really was curious.
     "Something on your mind?" Ethan inquired. He was waiting for it. There was some kind of bombshell she was waiting to drop on him.
     "Something came in the mail for you," she began, "A letter. It's from your principal. Regarding your birthday."
Ethan's heart dropped right into his stomach. This was exactly what he didn't want to think about. Let alone talk about it with Auntie Marie.
     "Your 18th... that's a big deal. Have you considered who might be your match?" Auntie Marie asked. Ethan avoided her pointed look.
     "No one? What about your friends? None of them?" She prodded. Ethan remained silent.
     "I... I don't..." he couldn't form the words, didn't know what to say. It was stuck in his mind and wouldn't move.
     "You what?" Auntie Marie pushed.
     "Nothing, I just haven't given it much thought," Ethan felt a pit in his stomach. Those words were more of a lie than his silence. It was all he could think about, it consumed him.
     "Well, it's a pretty important moment. You might need to take some time and really examine yourself," Auntie Marie lectured.
     "Okay, I'll do that," She gave him a skeptical look, "I promise."
     Auntie Marie seemed pleased, because she dropped the subject and got the bowls out to serve dinner. They ate in relative silence, but his mind cluttered with thoughts. All of them ending in the same direction: it didn't matter who it was, it could only end in disaster.

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     Ethan always ended his nights by going through his blog and answering all his questions that he missed that day. It never took very long, and he always enjoyed it.
     It was his way of coping with everything that was happening to him. With all the stress of the recent days it made him feel at ease knowing in this domain he could control the outcome. People came to him, and he gave them words of encouragement or words of strength and wisdom. Ethan was important, he mattered to someone.
     A blip from the monitor startled Ethan out of his train of thought. Someone had sent him a message. He moved to the private chat section, confused. He did live chats, but the hours for those were posted on the forum, and today wasn't it. He clicked on the icon.