Even though it has been five weeks since my grandma passed today, of all days, was really hard for me. I couldn't stop thinking about my grandma but was made it worse was that the night before my ex-stepdad, Steve, messaged me on Facebook, saying he missed us, and he was sorry. He also decided to say happy belated birthday since it was like 3 weeks ago. I didn't buy his bullshit, but I decided to talk to him, which had reminded me of why we never got along with him in the first place. He never takes the blame for his actions and always shuts down when it comes to emotions. I just couldn't handle it. After everything that has happened, I just could not take his shit today.
But if my day wasn't tough enough it was the first day of my senior year and I had no Idea what to wear or if I wanted to wear makeup or not. Even worse the audition music assignment came out today. So, I put on my white dress with roses on it, that my grandma made me, with a jean jacket over it. I did my makeup simple neutral smokey eye that made my brown eyes pop just enough. Made my way downstairs for the annual first day of school breakfast, but to my dismay, there was no more food left. My mom apologized and said my siblings were pigs, which isn't far from the truth. It was my fault I could hear them all eating, but I was still deciding on how today was going to go for me.
So, instead, I made my way out the door. As I walked out, my phone rang, with trumpet tones, it was Gus-Gus which made me give a slight smile and the text read.
Good morning, beautiful! I want to drive you to school this morning I will be there in 2 minutes.
I replied, okay! Nice timing I was headed out. I'll be waiting.
As I looked up for my phone he was waiting on the street for me. I always loved when we did things like that it made me smile. I looked at him as I got in the car; he smiled a childish smile and kissed me. " You look beautiful, Rose", as he handed me a coffee from my favorite shop. I shed a tear; he wiped it away with no questions and drove off for school. He knew what was wrong and knew I was all talked out about my grandma.
~~~
As we arrived at the school his question interrupted my thoughts, "Would you like me to drop you off at the doors?"
"No, I want to walk with the most important man in my life," I replied. He smiled and parked in the front row of parking spots. He got out as I gathered my things and open my door for me. As I got out of the car, he noticed that I was not acting like myself.
"Baby, are you going to be, okay?"
"Gus-Gus, Today is a very hard day to day with my grandma and what happened last night," I replied kind of quite so only he could hear me.
"What happened yesterday?" He asked with a genuine concern in his tone of voice.
"Well, Steve," I started to reply before Flynn ran up and interrupted us, and not far behind him was Mia. I had a suspicion that Mia and Flynn were dating but I didn't want to ask, especially if they were not ready to admit it yet. When I looked up at Gus-Gus he had a look like we were going to finish the conversation later.
~~~
Band rehearsal was not a struggle that morning because the music was always my way of letting my feelings out. Skyler kept to herself that morning. I was glad because I do not think I could have handled her that morning. Mr. Luxe assigned each section audition parts. I could already play my parts, but I was still going to practice, so I can beat Skyler for the first chair. She never played with emotion or dynamics, so I was going to beat her at her own game. She knew I struggled to count when I played alone, But I wasn't going to rest until I was the best in that room.
After band that morning, I just went through the motions. I was not really interested in the day or what was going on. No one seemed to notice, I was extremely thankful because I did not want to talk about it anymore. But just as I was walking to my last class of the day Mr. Luxe stopped me in the hall.
