Memories of Dawn

Chapter : 01

To remind you all, the story from here is set on Ray's highschool days. Just in case you forgot.

Oh and that's the mysterious girl above ;) If anyone knows her name (in real life) please comment it.

Ray's P.O.V

I jerked out of my sleep and sat up, gasping for breath. My heart was racing in my chest and it felt as if it was beating at a rate of thousand miles per hour. Even though the weather was cold, I had sweated all over, my clothes completely sticking to my body. I wiped the perspiration off my forehead and coughed a few times to get my breathing under control. I just sat on the bed for a few minutes, panting, with my head on my hands, to calm myself down.

I had that dream again. Dream of that day, of him. The dream was in red - red with blood; his blood and he was covered in it. Blood was all over me too. I looked down at my shaking hand that was blood stained moments ago. After all this time, I still couldn't get over that incident. These nightmares haunted me wherever I went and almost every night I had them. His words echoing in my mind all the time. This was my punishment, which I rightfully deserved.

I couldn't get back to sleep in this state. Looking at my bedside clock I saw it was around 5:30 am. I got up, freshened up and changed out of my sweaty clothes into a pair of clean jeans and T-shirt, and put on my hoodie over those. I looked out the window that faced the hill behind the dorm. It seemed the night was going to end soon. Perfect.

I slowly opened the door of my room, trying to make as little sound as possible. Although I didn't need to try much, as I did this everyday. Going out at this hour had become my daily routine. And the only place I ever went was to the hill. The hill was where I escaped. Luckily for me, not many people went there - and definitely not at this hour. That is one of the reason why I went to the hill. It was the only place where I could get any peace now. The silence there calmed me down like nothing else.

I quietly walked down the stairs, looking out for anyone who could be awake, though that was unlikely. As I passed the room of the dorm's supervisor and caretaker, Mr. Gibbs, I slowed my pace and walked in tip toes. The main door of the dorm was always open so that meant one less trouble for me. Although I reformed a lot of my bad habits, I couldn't let go of this habit of going out in the hours I am supposed to stay indoors.

I pulled up my hoodie as soon as I came out the door. The wind was quite chilly and also I didn't want anyone to see my face - if anyone was awake at such a time and had the ability to see clearly in the dark. But why take the chance?

As I walked towards the hill, the nightmares, or should I say the memories of that incident, came flashing down in my mind. That incident changed me forever. And till now I was paying for it. But instead of stopping the images, I let them flow now. It hurt a lot seeing those horrid images but each time I saw those in my mind, I grew a little bit accustomed to it. Or so I said to myself. Because instead of those images forcing their way in my mind, I thought it was better that I let them in myself. And that way I also wouldn't forget them. He said to do that.

Don't ever forget what you did.

I didn't forget those even for a moment. How can anyone forget such heinous deeds?

That got me thinking of what else he told me to do that day.

Change. Change yourself completely, to the point the new you wouldn't even recognise the current you.

I changed. I was still changing and trying my best to reach the point he wanted me to reach.

These thoughts ran through my mind as I hiked up the narrow trail between trees of the small forest on the hill that lead to the cliff.