Full House- A Lilo Family Story

Burden

This chapter could be extremely triggering and upsetting so please read at your own risk.

Harry had been having a horrible week. He didn't understand any of his school work and he felt stupid, he hadn't slept more than an hour the past four days because of nightmares, he'd had a panic attack every day for various reasons, and he was wetting the bed every night. He knew that his dada and papa were stressed out from trying to deal with him, they had lost a lot of sleep too. Harry felt like he was a burden to the whole family. He knew he was handful but he couldn't help it, he literally didn't know how to act his age. Psychiatrists had told Louis and Liam that due to the abuse he suffered through that at his best, Harry wouldn't ever emotionally reach past the age of 12. He was about 3 or 4 right now. Harry wasn't stupid though and a lot of people didn't understand that. He understood their degrading comments towards him. With Harry it was that he always thought if someone left, they were leaving him forever or if he got hit that it was a beating he deserved because he was a worthless human being, that's what his biological parents had imprinted in his mind. He could do things for himself such as showering and making his own dinner but because of his emotional state he would still never be able to live alone. He was tired of relying on people, he was tired of having nightmares, he was tired of having to still wear nappies at 12 years old, he was tired of the panic attacks, he was tired of living.
 He had slipped into a deep depression over the past few weeks and nothing could make him shake the feeling of not wanting to be alive anymore. He never thought he'd have enough courage to try anything but this past week was shitty enough to push him over the edge.

Harry sat in his bathtub with a razor in his hand. It was 1am and everyone in the house was asleep. They'd be happy when they woke up and found Harry dead, he was a burden to them all. These were Harry's thoughts as he dragged the razor vertically on his left wrist.He whimpered a bit at the pain but kept going. He did the same to his right wrist. He let out a quiet sob as blood poured out, he dropped the razor as he felt himself get light headed. This was it. He heard a knock on the door but he was too weak to answer.

Zayn had gotten up to use the toilet but he saw the light was already on. He knocked on the door but there was no answer, he turned the knob and surprisingly it was unlocked. He wasn't prepared for what he saw though. Harry was laying in the bath tub, blood everywhere,soaking his clothes with his wrists still bleeding, his eyes half closed and looking dazed, and a razor on the floor. Zayn rushed over to Harry and taking off both their shirts wrapping one tightly around each of Harry's wrists. He was so scared for his baby brother and he didn't know what to do, he started crying.

"Harry please! Talk to me, it's me Zayn! DAD PAPA HELP! DAD PAPA!" Zayn was sobbing as Louis and Liam ran in still looking half asleep. As soon as they saw the scene in front of them they were alert. Louis grabbed Harry and broke down sobbing while Liam called 999 and escorted Zayn out of the room and helped him wash the blood off his hands and chest.

Soon the whole family was sitting in the waiting room in the ER. Zayn was holding a sleeping Niall, still trying to get the images of finding Harry like that out of his head. Marcel was holding Zayn against his chest, he came down to the ER as soon as Zayn called him. Liam was trying to console a sobbing Louis who was still covered in Harry's blood even Liam also felt like he could break any minute. A door opened and Dr. Sugg rushed in and went to hug Louis and Liam.

"I came down to the ER as soon as I heard what happened, have you heard anything yet?" Liam shook his head no but just then another doctor walked in.

"Harry Paylinson?" They all stood up.

"We gave him a blood transfusion and he's awake now asking for you, he's quite upset. It was a really close call and whoever wrapped the shirts around his wrists saved his life, he would have bled out in seconds if they didn't do that."
Liam and Louis engulfed Zayn in a hug, kissing his cheek and thanking him for knowing what to do. Truth is Zayn didn't know what to do, he just went into survival mode to try and save his little brother.

Marcel stayed outside with Niall while the rest of them went to see Harry. As soon as they walked in Harry broke down crying.

I-I'm s-s-sorry I d-don't w-want to d-die a-anymore, I j-just felt l-like a b-burden on everyone." Louis picked him up carefully trying not to disturb the wires attached to him and began rocking Harry back and forth while he cried too. Everyone in the room was crying.

"No baby no never think that, you're definitely not a burden. We were so scared Hazza. We never want to lose you."

"I'm s-sorry p-papa." Louis held him closer.

"Shh it's okay baby, it's over now and we're here with you, we love you so much." Eventually Louis gave Harry to Liam so he could hold him too. Marcel came in the room a bit later and they all took turns holding Harry. The doctor told them that Harry would have to stay in hospital for a week to be evaluated and to make sure he wouldn't try again but Dr. Sugg quickly explained that that wasn't possible due to Harry's emotional state and his everyday needs. He explained that would only make things worse so the other doctor reluctantly allowed them to take Harry home the next day. Liam and Louis talked to Dr. Sugg and they agreed on Harry seeing a therapist once a week. The therapist was Caspar, Joe's husband who specialized in treating children with emotionally disturbed pasts. Liam and Louis had avoided Harry going to a therapist in the past because they felt he was too young and all the questioning would make him have a panic attack but now they knew it was best for him.

The next morning they thanked all the doctors and nurses that helped Harry and took him home. It was a different atmosphere, it was very solemn and quiet and they didn't really know how to act around Harry, they wanted to leave what happened in the past but they couldn't act like it didn't happen. It was going to be a difficult road back to where they used to be but they were ready to attack it head on. They wanted their happy,bubbly Hazza back but for now they were just beyond grateful that he was still with them. None of them could picture their lives without him.

     So I thought of this prompt, I wanted this story to take a more serious turn. It won't last long because I'll do time skips, I don't want it to get too depressing. There will be plenty of happy prompts in the future. Anyway I don't have anything else to say about this besides leave a comment telling me what you thought of this chapter.