Paranoia (Zayn Malik) (editing)

Chapter 15: Last Night

Luna's POV

I let the water from the shower beat down onto my skin, burning it ever so slightly while the glass surrounding me steams up, only clouding my senses further.

I don't know if I'm trying to relax or wash Zayn's touch off of me. 

After he left last night, I didn't dare follow him. I stayed in my bed, staring at the ceiling, failing to fall asleep the whole night. I heard the front door go, signifying he left the house. I don't know if he's returned.

Fragments of memories of his lips on my skin torment me, causing my heart to speed up and arousal to flood through me. I can't help but fantasize about the way his teeth tugged on my nipple, the wet kisses he left across my jaw. I dissociate from my body often, but now I've never been so connected to myself. I feel every emotion in part of my body.

I turn off the water. It's not helping me calm down. 

I have to keep convincing myself last night actually did happen. I've never known Zayn to be so passionate about anything, so heated. He is calm, monotone, grey in the face of black and white, but last night, he was red hot. I caught a glimpse of the version of him that is intense the night I walked in on him and Jade on the sofa, and I have thought of the way his hands gripped her flesh and the way his tongue travelled up her neck often, but the feeling in person was more than I had ever considered it to be.

I step out of the shower into my white tile bathroom, water dripping from my body and I can't help but imagine what Zayn would do if he saw me like this. Would he like it? Or would he run away like he did last night?

In an attempt to stop my wandering mind, I wrap myself in a towel and dry off, moving to my bedroom and quickly getting dressed into a top and leggings, deciding that if I show off skin I might not be able to stop myself from urging Zayn to touch it. 

It is like something that lay dormant in me for a long time was fed for the first time when he kissed me. Something intrinsic that I have starved for a long time.

My head-fog seems to fill the room, so I exit, descending the stairs like I have done a thousand times before, but this time my legs are shaking, my ankles are weak and my heart is pounding out of my chest as my eyes search for him. I make my way to the kitchen, and unsurprisingly he's not sat there. I assume he's avoiding me. 

I step back into the hallway, brushing my hand over my hair. The longer we let this sit, the more awkward it gets. 

The lock on the front door clicks and my head immediately turns in its direction. I watch anxiously as Zayn's figure comes into view, slick with sweat and bare-chested, tattoos littered over his chest and arms, wearing only shorts and running trainers. He has returned from his run much later than he normally does, his schedule is off

His eyes are wide as they catch onto me, mouth parted, breathing heavily. I'm sure I display a similar look. We stand like this for at least two minutes, each of us too nervous to pop the bubble of silence. 

"Cat got your tongue?" I choke out eventually. 

He doesn't laugh, his nostrils flare. 

"I guess so." 

I shift uncomfortably on the spot, even with all this distance between us, the memory of his lips runs rampant in my head.

"Are we going to ignore what happened?" I decide straight-shooting is probably the easiest way into this.

He looks to the floor, making fists of his hands "It shouldn't have happened." 

"But it did."

"Luna." He agonises, looking back up at me now with a pained expression "Please, we need to leave it be."