No Love Lost

Chapter 3♥

"Deeyona Matthews"

"Here" I said raising my hand

"Rachel Nicholson"

"Here"

"Good..Now that everyone is here ill be passing your journals back out turn to the next page and began telling about your weekend" Mrs Smith stood to her feet passing around our journals.

"So whats the twist" a girl that sat behind me asked. I turned around and ended up making eye contact with Major. My eyes locked with his and a rush of pain , sorrow, and love came over me. I started to feel like I felt when I first met him but at the same time hurt an embarrassed, After a few seconds of looking at him I broke my starring by rolling my eyes and turning back around. Now that im no longer with him Im beginning to hate every class that me and him chose together.

"Ahh im glad you asked" Mrs Smith said rubbing her chin. She made this more than just a journalism class. She called it 'expanding our craniums'.

"I want you to use a song lyric...a clean song lyric, ill give you all but 20 minutes of class... you may begin writting."

I sat back in my chair thinking over my weekend. After about 15 minutes I knew the perfect song. I opened my journal and began writing.

...They say with age comes wisdom
And the white flag I cant give em'

Im tryna tell you how its suppose to be
See this is more than just a song to me

Cause ive been up against the wall
Everything you going through ive been there before

Ive seen them all come and ive seen them all go
But you can bet your last that my head wont hit the floor
Never
Im still standing....

I figured Monica explained my situation just perfectly. I closed my journal and walked to her desk. "May I go to the rest room" I ask handing her the journal. I already knew her answer but I patiently waited on it. Once she nodded her head I grabbed my bag and headed to the rest room. I didnt plan on coming back to class. This was the last period of the day and only 15 minutes left.

Just as I made it around the corner for the restroom i heard my name being called.

I turned around and seen Major jogging my way. I felt like I had butterflies in my stomach. But that ended rather quickly.

"What!" I semi yelled

"Damn why so harsh baby ..what you doing tonight I aint heard from ya' in a few days." He said rubbing his hands together showing his perfectly straight teeth.

"I thought i was just a jump off" I said lowering my voice and looking off to the side avoiding eye contact.

"Ahh come on dee you know I didnt mean that I was mad babe.." he said grabbing my hands firmly but assertive and pulling me towards him "plus my baby moma pissed me off and i took my anger out on you"

I hated when he did things like this, his well built body stood 6'1" hovering over my 5'6" figure drove me crazy. He would always give me this same pout when he wanted something.

"...and you know you miss me as much as I missed you.." he grabbed my chin pulling my face towards his forcing me to look into those light hazel eyes.

I just sat there speechless, It was no doubt that i missed him. Or that I wouldn't give anything to get us back how we were. I just couldn't say that i missed him but I couldn't say that i didn't when i know i did. Im not sure if I want him to know that though.

"So how about you come over around 11"

I smirked pulling my way out of his grip, typical Major, always wanting me around when no one else was.

"I might, why so late is your babymother going to be having the rest of your attention? "

"Why all the questions either be there or not dee" he said rubbing his face in irritation 

I sat speechless once again, I needed to tell him how I felt but I just didn't know how. Major was the only person that I wanted and he had my all, I didn't want to say or do anything to completely lose him.

"Sure ill be over right after work" I finally gave in.

"Aight ill see you later on then .... oh and don't show up empty handed if you know what I mean " he said with a slight smirk. He winked and made his way back to class.

I sighed and made my way to the restroom. I have to admit im a fool in love. Yes i have my rough patches with him but he gives me that love and security that i need. That feeling that's unexplainable... it draws me in everytime, so can you blame me ?

I made my way to the mirror taking long gazes at my self. I looked at all of my imperfections. I really liked who i was but sometimes Major and my mom made me feel less than I was. Am I fat? More like an hour glass with a little bit more sand. But am I ugly? Far from it, my medium- long hair was all mine, pure carmel skin tone, and my eyes could stop traffic. If any thing I found myself stunning, but hey to each its own. One day they'll realize im a diamond in the rough and hopefully they wont miss out.

The bell rang shifting me from my thoughts. I picked up my bag and made my way to my car, my next stop....work