Rehab

Chapter Three: Familiar Faces

I sit in the locker room, the tears slowly streaming down my face. I try to keep myself away from the other boys because I don't want them to see me like this; crying over a football game. And it isn't the first time we lost, but this time it is different. We lost because it is my fault. I should have just passed the ball to the other boys instead of hogging it. I should have seen early on in the game that I was having a bad game. I was missing my shots left and right. But no, me being me just had to keep going with it. What kind of football captain was I? Instead of helping the team I brought us down. Stupid. Stupid. That was the only thing running in my head. All of a sudden I hear the door open.

"Louis, ya in here?" I hear Coach ask.

"Ya," I say weakly. I don't want him to yell at me.

"Oh Louis," he says sighing as soon as he sees my face. I expect him to start screaming and to tell me to grow up. But he doesn't. He sits next to me on the bench. "Listen kid. You are going to have bad games. No one is perfect. You cannot be the star every game. But do you know why I kept you in for the whole game?" I nod my head no. "To teach ya a lesson, and an important one too. Football is a team sport and lately you've been playing like you're the only one on the team. You are a great player. But you are not the only great one here. Now these boys are gonna be pissed at ya. But they will not be mad for long. But just learn to pass the ball."

"I thought I had it," I whisper.

"Louis, ya gotta let this go. Today we lost, and being upset and angry about it won't change the results. It will just give ya wrinkles. Now wipe ya tears and get up," he tells me.

"Okay Coach. Thank you," I say and get up and leave.

Present Day

I walk into the church dressed in a suit and tie my mom picked out for me and am pretty sure is from when I graduated high school. I look around and already want to leave. Not only do I see old soccer pals that I could care less about having a conversation with, but  I keep getting dirty looks from everyone around me. They look at me as if they know what I've done and my life, but they don't know what I've been through, and I don't care to tell them. I take my seat with my mom and Lottie in a pew with only one person in it. They are looking down at there feet, and I think I hear a whimper or two. All of a sudden I recognize who it is; the blonde hair, the pale skin and the Irish flag cufflinks: Niall Horan. All of a sudden I see him raising his head and turn toward me to see who is sitting next to him.

"Louis Tomlinson?" he says with a confused face. Are people really this shocked that I am back in Holbrooke?

"Hi Niall," I say. Niall is a good kid, and he is that friend that you love but you always shit on there life anyways. He came here from Ireland when I was like eight and always idolized me. He laughs at all my jokes, always made sure I had enough water and kissed the ground I walked on.

"How are ye mate? Terrible what happened to coach. I remember playing for him like it was the other day," he keeps talking but I'm barely listening. I don't really care what he has to say. All of a sudden the priest comes out and the funeral begins. I hear crying all around the church, but I stay strong.

"Louis, did you write your eulogy?" my mom asks me.

"What?" I say.

"Your eulogy for coach? You were supposed to write one," she says.

"No mom, I said I might as in I wasn't going to," I tell her. That's when I hear the priest say my name to tell me to come up and give my eulogy. Fuck. I awkwardly walk up, hands shaking and palms sweating. I look around at all the miserable faces here. They are all staring at me waiting to hear me say how amazing and kind coach was. How he was a hero in so many ways and was a guy you wanted to know because he was welcoming. But that was not coach. So I tell them the truth.

"I'm not here today to tell you John Harlock was an amazing kind man who loved everyone and treated people with respect. No, Coach was the man who wasn't afraid to tell you 'Why are ye even here? This is football, not ballet ya pansie!'" I hear the crowd chuckling. Good Louis, keep going. "And I know anyone who had him as a coach heard that at least one or twice. Niall, most likely more than that." I hear Niall burst into laughter. "He was brutally honest, but we loved him for it. And although sometimes the truth hurt, it was always constructive criticism to help us get better. And we would do it because we knew if we didn't we would be running suicides." More laughs. Good, I need to stop seeing everyone so sad.

"But, all jokes aside now, although he was a pain the as-arse, sorry, he was always there for you. I don't know about other people here today, but he was a father figure to me. I remember the time, just like it was yesterday, he came to me after a game we lost, and it was my fault. I, like usual, was being a ball hog. I was of course bummed like any 12 year old would be. But he told me some good advice. He told me 'Louis, ya gotta let this go. Today we lost, and being upset and angry about it won't change the results. It will just give ya wrikles.' And if you look at my forehead I obviously didn't listen very well.

"He told me other advice too. Little things like never give up and don't take no for an answer. If you have a goal chase it. And if you don't stop that ball from going into the damn net you will run suicides for the rest of practice! Ah wait, that advice was for Liam." I look at Liam Payne in the crowd and see him getting red, but then start to chuckle along with other people.

"Coach, if you are here listening to this right now, know that everyone here will miss you. I am sorry I never got to say my last goodbye to you. You deserved it too, but maybe I can give it to you in another life. And I hope that you are at peace whether you are in heaven, or the more likely place, well we all know where. You will never be forgotten and are a legend that will live on forever. I just want to thank you for not just everything you did for me, but everything you taught me as well. Rest easy coach. Thank you." I step down and head back to my pew. The funeral ends and we go into another room of the church where there are small sandwiches, brownies and other sweets and things to drink.

I eat a cookie, but I'm really not that hungry and just want to leave and get out of here. It is finally hitting me that he is actually gone. A man I looked up to and I didn't even say goodbye. I can feel myself getting angry, so I tell my mom I'm leaving. I can't stand to be here any longer. Thank god I brought my own car. I get in it and leave the church parking lot, and someone comes out right behind me. I can't see who it is, but it seems like they are following me. I'm not really sure where I'm going, but I'm guessing its the same place as the person behind me.

While driving I start to remember a secret place Harry and I used to go to hang out. It is on the outskirts of town on a hiking trail. I start driving that way, and the car behind me stops following me. Thank god, I was starting to get a bit creeped out. I reach my destination, and start walking to Harry and I's secret rock. Its pretty big compared to my small body, and I climb on it, looking around to make sure no one is there, and pull out a joint I had in my pocket in case something like this happened. Always good to be prepared. All of a sudden I hear someone coming towards me and the sound of leaves cracking. I look around and it is Harry. I try to hide my joint, but I can tell he's already figured out what I'm doing by the disgusted look on his face.

"I had a feeling what I was smelling wasn't skunk," he says and climbs onto the rock next to me. And I just let him sit there.