Life, Suicide, and Finding Heaven

I sat outside the train station, waiting for the right moment—the moment that would end my life. In the distance, I could hear the train's approach, the sound growing louder as it came down the long tracks. I braced myself. Am I sure I want to do this? I thought. My best friend was killed because of me. Of course I want to do this.

I could see the train, growing closer with each passing second. I closed my eyes, and just as it was only a few meters away, I jumped. The pain was unbearable. I could feel my bones beginning to break, and my organs beginning to burst. Blackness swallowed me whole, and I crashed to the ground with a thud, landing in a cold, windowless room.

I wandered aimlessly for hours, wondering if I was in purgatory. I should be in heaven with Matt—after all, he was a Christian. I was too, well, sort of. I believed in heaven, or at least in some kind of place you go when you die, but not in God. It was just how I saw things. When I was five, my mother was diagnosed with cancer. A few months later, we found out it was terminal.

I sat on the floor beside my bed praying every night. "Please, God answer me." I would cry. "Please, heal my mother; I do not want her to die." Every night I continued this ritual. I would wait for an answer, anything, but nothing would come.

Months later while I was outside playing my father got a call from the hospital saying she had passed away in her sleep. That's when I stopped believing. I just thought that there was a place you go when you die, but no God.

My mother had it easy. I thought she passed away in her sleep. I on the other hand jumped in front of a train.

There was a sound and it brought me back to reality. It was like a door was slowly opening. I looked around a saw a red door that I hadn't noticed before. I walked over to it and pushed it open cautiously. Warm air pulsated from the other side of the door. There was a beautiful field with red tulips in front of me.

The sun was shining and I could see a small cabin in the distance. I treaded through the flowers and managed to make it to the cabin in ten minutes. I knocked on the door. It opened. There was an old man sitting on a chair reading a book. "H-hello are you god?" I asked him. He looked startled and put his book down on the night stand. "No, Charlie I am not God."

How, how did he know my name? "I know allot of things Charlie. I can read your mind you know."

"What the hell?" Was all I could get out. "I know you may be confused but don't worry, I will have Max explain it to you. He will be your, erm what do you call it....Oh yes teacher."

I looked around me for a boy, but I couldn't find him. "If you're looking for Max he is outside."

I walked out the door utterly confused. There was a boy who looked like about ten years old. He took my hand and led me behind the cabin.

"Charlie, you are here because you are not allowed to pass the bridge.' The bridge I thought what is the bridge. "The bridge is a way into heaven; you may not pass it if you ended your life abruptly."

Great he can read my mind as well. "Am, I going to hell?" I asked Max. "No, only if you have committed a terrible crime."

I sighed; this was starting to get really confusing.

"Max, please I want to go to heaven, I want to be with my friend Matt I want to be with my mom." A tear slipped down my cheek. "I don't make the rules I just enforce em'"

I was starting to get angry. "Yeah well, who does? Huh is it the old man?" I yelled. I ran into the cabin startling the old man. "I want in to heaven and I know you know a way into it." I yelled at him furiously.

"I cannot let you in Charlie." I knocked over a lamp and kicked a chair over. "Now, now Charlie don't we think we're being a little childish?" He said in a calm voice. I was mad. "I don't care about the rules, I will find that bridge and I will cross it without your help!" I stormed out of the house slamming the door in the process.

"Charlie, wait!" Max yelled from behind me. I pushed him from my mind and continued down the field of tulips. After awhile Max stopped yelling and forgot about me. I was getting tired and wanted desperately to have a sleep. I sat down underneath a large oak tree and sighed. I closed my eyes and slowly became unconscious.

I awoke dazed and confused. Where was I? Why am I sleeping outside, oh wait. It all came flooding back to me, the train, Max, everything.

I got up and walked towards an overgrown forest.

It was very eerily. It had a dark feel about it and humidity hung low in the air. I continued throught the forest. I made it to a small clearing and I noticed a bridge. I found it. I was smiling I ran towards it. As I got to the middle an invisible force field was stopping me from entering forwards. Max appeared on my left.

"I found you Charlie." I jumped. "H-how the hell what the....." I was saying utterly confused He can teleport? "Yeah, it is a gift some of us teachers have."

I tried pushing further and further but the invisible force wouldn't let me.

A button appeared in Max's hand. I looked at it. It was red and shiny. "Goodbye Charlie. He said as he pressed the button. The bottom of the bridge opened up and I was falling, falling through the clouds. "Shit, Max I am sorry I will follow the rules .please just bring me back up there."

He appeared beside me, "Step number one, making amends starting now."

He disappeared and I was plummeting down the earth's floor at high velocity.

Jade was getting ready to have a nice warm shower when her blue Iphone began vibrating in her pocket. She opened it and checked her text messages. Bla, bla, bla, party at Adams bla,bla,bla I do not think I will be attending this she sighed. Parties were not Jades thing. Adam had a thing for Jade. She was not interested and had turned him down many o f times before. He would always ask why? But she was to afraid to answer him. He was an ass and always cheated on his girl friends. He was biased and only cared about looks. Jade was a blonde haired girl who had a nose piercing and wore skinny jeans, graphic Tee's and Converse all-stars. She was an average looking girl. Jade wanted to know why he liked her.

She threw her phone onto her bed and walked into the bathroom. She started undressing and threw her clothes into the clothes hamper. She turned on the shower head and waited for the shower to heat up. When it was a good enough temperature she climbed in. It felt nice and soothing. She could stay for hours in a shower. She rinsed her hair and grabbed a bottle of Bed Head Shampoo. She rubbed it vigorously through her blonde hair. She closed her eyes and stuck her soapy wet hair under the tap rinsing all the shampoo from her hair. When she opened her eyes she was awe stuck.

There was a boy in her shower. "What the hell are you doing in here?" She screamed in fear. I have a freaking pervert in my shower. She thought. "I am so sorry but Max he wouldn't let me cross the bridge and I was falling down from heaven and-"She cut him off and said "If that is some sort of pick up line it's not working. Why are you in my shower?"

He said the same thing as before. "Did you forget to take your meds?" She asked him in a flat tone.

He looked at her like she was dumb. "Get out!" He didn't move. Jade threw a bottle of shampoo at him and it simply went through him. "Y-you're a g-ghost." She stammered. She started to sway and fell hitting the ground.

Oh my God there's a passed out naked girl in front of me Charlie thought to himself. That is not a sight you see everyday.