The Old Lady and her flowers

CHAPTER SIX

Well, there was one catch. I quickly realized, though, that it was far easier to make the decision than actually execute it. It happened so the very next morning. I woke up and visualized my day like I did every morning; sitting snugly on my bed with my blanket around my shoulders and gazing out of the window as the sun steadily rose. I heard Sister Lisa yawn above me in the double closeted bed that we shared. I got out of the bed when it was still dark in the room but I could see that the sun was peeping a little from behind the distant mountains casting beautiful amber rays across the cold morning sky.

                On any other day, I have a set of tasks to be completed from the dawn to dusk and I remained focused on them- formulating ways of getting some children out of bed who were not ready to do so, helping the nuns to set the day running, then in the afternoon, I’d gather the children and work on their studies, then take care of some of the sick ones and so on. It kept me busy and by the time I finish every thing for the day it is night already. But not that morning. I wandered clueless for a long time through the hallway and finally decided to get ready and go down. On the ground floor, towards the front gate, I heard some talking and proceeded towards the voices to find a nun, tired and sleepy, buying milk from Arthur. He looked up as I went near them and smiled a grateful smile, I returned it not really knowing what else to do or say.

                Sister Nora took the milk can and screwed it, then lugged it with huge effort towards the pantry.

“May I help you, Sister? It’s a bit heavy…” I said moving forward, my arms out stretched. She looked up at me, then quickly back at Arthur and continued without taking a slight notice of me. I sighed; this was becoming usual now, the staring, and the mutterings. If only they knew I did nothing wrong…I didn’t know for how many more day I’d have to face such indifference and disappointment from them. I gazed after her as if will to make her see things my way.

“Sister, are you okay?” came Arthur’s inquiry from behind me. I turned, rearranging the frown on my face with a smile,

“Please call me Maya. I am much younger that you.”

He smiled back a little, slightly uncomfortable and apologetic,

“I got you into trouble, didn’t I Maya? I am sorry for that.”

“It’s no trouble, Sir. If I can help, I should, right? Don’t feel sorry.”

“They are treating you badly after you talk last night,” he motioned with his eyes towards the pantry door.

“It’s fine. Sooner or later they will understand. I am sure of it.”

“Thank you so much, Maya.”

“I haven’t done anything yet, Sir. I don’t know how it will work out. Don’t thank me yet. Just give me some time to think.”

“Nevertheless, at least you will try.”

I smiled in response. He waved to me and got on his bicycle and disappeared away in to the fading darkness.

Yes, I was going to try.

                Unfortunately, I hadn’t tried even when Christmas was approaching fast. It is easier said than done. For past one month, I had spent innumerable hours thinking, just thinking of somewhere to start my task. What was I waiting for? I didn’t know. Courage, ideas, divine intervention, any damn thing will do. But yet, I hadn’t tried after one full month of my last talk with Arthur. I had said I’d try. But when? And how? The hall was undergoing decoration for Christmas since past week and I had absorbed myself into the work, still this nagging worry remained in the corner of my mind. The farther I pushed this more worrying it became and Arthur might start losing faith again. These days he gave me a hopeful smile every morning as he poured milk for us. I would only return it half heartedly. I had to start somewhere. I made up my mind to take the first step forward no matter how it turned out to be.