Secret Lover(s)

Chapter 2

You sit at the desk in your room, staring blankly at the calculus problem that had been the bane of your existence for the past hour or so. Bobby had insisted you finish your education, though you didn't see any point in it now. The only credits you had left to take were nine elective credits and three math credits. For electives, you were taking Norse mythology, Greek mythology, and comparative religions. Those three you could understand and you saw the significance they held for your new life, but calculus? The only point of calculus was to drive you insane day after day. There were more important things to worry about than calculus, but Bobby wouldn't let you help on hunts until you finished your homework. You felt like a toddler being put in a time out. Bobby's friends were being torn to pieces by vengeful spirits and here you sat, trying to understand math.

You sit in silence as frustrated tears stream down your face. All of the sudden, you hear the roar of Dean's car. Well this is just fucking perfect, you think to yourself. The boys had been gone for about a month. You thought about them every day, both of them. They would text or call you daily and your love for each of them only grew. You feared seeing them again; you feared having to choose one brother over the other. What if you made the wrong choice? What if when they found out and they both decided they didn't want you?

These fears resurfaced the second you heard the car pull up. The tears streaming down your face progressed to sobs as the thought of hurting one or both of them crossed your mind yet again. Why now? Out of all the times they could've shown up, they choose when I'm already frustrated as Hell.

You hear the front door open and close and two sets of footsteps ascend the stairs and stop in front of your door. A knock sounds and Dean's voice graces your ears, "Hey Y/N, it's us, Sam and Dean. You in there?"

"Just a minute," you say in a shaky voice.

"Y/N, what's wrong?" Sam asks as the locked door handle twists.

"Nothing, I just need a minute," you say as you pull your legs up and place your feet on the chair, wrapping your arms around your legs and resting your forehead on your knees.

"It sure as Hell ain't nothing," you hear Dean say as the door handle shakes. It stops and you know they're picking the lock now. You bury your head further in your knees as the door swings open and the boys rush to either side of you. Two sets of hands run along your back and arms in an attempt to comfort you. "Tell us what's wrong," Dean says.

"I'm so stupid," you sob. You're not just referring to the calculus, but to the fact that you had managed to fall so completely in love with two men, brothers no less; not that they realized that.

"Hey, stop it," Dean says, "I'm the high school drop out here." You know he's trying to help, but your sobs just continue.

"Dean, I don't think you're helping," Sam says.

"Well it's true!" Dean retorts.

Sam removes his hand from your arm and you hear the rustle of papers. "Calculus?" he asks. Your only response is the nod of your head.

"Dean, can you go downstairs and tell Bobby what's been going on with us? Give me a few hours and I'll have this fixed," Sam says. He runs a hand over your hair.

Dean makes the same action before standing to leave the room. "You're not stupid Y/N, no matter what you think," he says before shutting the door behind him.

Finally alone with Sam, he places a hand on either side of your face and lifts your tear flooded eyes to meet his beautiful hazel ones. "You shouldn't tell lies about yourself," Sam says as his thumbs rub away the trails of water that tears have left down your cheeks. He leans in towards you and his lips press against yours. You know you should stop this, you should tell him about you and Dean, but you can't, you don't want to. His tongue slides into your mouth and you lose yourself in the kiss; it actually calms you down and stops your crying.