11pm Thoughts

What is my deal?
What am I persuing?
Why do I constantly
feel
The need to fucking
steal
Happiness
from other
people.
My life is a constant running sequel
Or the worst book in the world
I'm always so angry it
Swirled
My heart didn't stop
it
furled.

Please I do not wish to
see
What it is like to be
me
My thoughts, God let them
free.
Because pain is sticking inside of me
And I still cannot fucking
see
Why the evil one is
me
Please let me
be
Because I know I'll hurt you darling
Please,
Just listen for the winds whisper in the
trees.
For picking myself up is impossible,
See,
I am not Hercules.

So my brain will continue fighting the never ending
crusade
Every emotion in its on
black nightshade
Throwing fists at each other like grenades
And still I can't fucking
persuade
What I do what I feel, is it all real,
Or do I ought to believe in the impossible?

These are my 11pm thoughts .