A Life Wasted

Authors Note on Accuracy

Going back more than fifty years is a challenge for a person with a good memory, something I do not claim to possess. My wife often accuses me of having a selective memory, and I suppose she's right. My memory is odd. I can remember and rewrite computer code I wrote thirty years ago, but can't remember the name of the person who paid me to write it, or even the name of someone I met yesterday. I'm good with most technical stuff, but not so good with things I subconsciously discount as unimportant. That's why Mary calls my memory selective. I remember important things, and we differ on what we consider important, though I do manage to remember her birthday and our anniversary.

I didn't think I had trouble remembering the chronology of events until I began writing my memoir. I have found this to be a problem in several important sequences of events. I remember the significant events, in most cases remember them in great detail, but sometimes have trouble remembering the sequential order of things.

Fortunately, at least fortunately for historic accuracy, the FBI and the federal courts have developed a rather thorough and accurate accounting of my history. As part of federal criminal sentencing a Pre-Sentence Investigation (PSI) is conducted, with a report given to the judge and all parties. I get a copy. Through this document I have the actual dates when I enlisted in the service, every time I went AWOL, when I was discharged, every crime committed, (that they have a record of) every arrest, every escape, and every release. Throughout this story when you see an exact date, it is a date provided by this PSI. And it is certifiable as the date the event occurred. You'll know this as an exact, known date when I write it out, i.e. April 24, 1975. When I am sure an event occurred between two know dates, but unsure of the exact date, I take a guess, but don't give an actual date. In that case I might write "two weeks later" as my best guess, or May 1975. I have omitted a few events because I can't accurately nail down the time frame.

Having the dates from this report was critical in building an accurate chronology of my life. Without it there would be too many holes to call this an accurate recounting of events. In writing the story there are times I would be off on my perception of time lapses, like believing several months had passed between an escape in Florida and a crime in Texas, only to find that according to the record only a few weeks had passed. There are many instances where I have trouble believing I had done so much and traveled so many miles in such a short span of time. Days or weeks, where months would seem impossible. But I accept the record as factual and my memory as flawed on the timing. I am ashamed that I have such a lengthy official record of my life, but thankful for reason of accuracy it provides here.

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