Putting it Together

No Color

I feel like I live in a world with no color.

My colorful aura feels left out in this world filled with no color. People can tell that I am not the same as them.

At first, I tried to hide it and not let them take the color out of me, but as I grew up it seemed to be a lot harder than it usually is. It was draining my energy trying to hide it.

After growing to be too tired to hide my colorful personality, I started letting some of it out. I let out my feelings slowly, but the changes were quick. I lost the many people I thought where going to be there with me, instead of other colorful bodies there was empty, dark gaps surrounding me.

I felt so much pressure, too much that I think I could handle. I remembered I still had a friend, a friend just as colorful as I was. It felt as if I was alone, but with another lonely body to accompany me through this vacuum our parents seem to tell us and reassure us that we can go through perfectly fine.

I was in love with this other body of color, it made me feel like if I was flying above clouds of cotton candy and teddy bears. The mentioning of this other colorful being made my soul fly out of my body doing flips and tricks. I felt alive every time I was with it, it was my savior.

The more attached I got to this thing, the better I felt. I grew so attached to it, people started looking at me as if I was crazy about it. I started feeling even more and more rejected. The more I talked about it, the more time I spent with it I felt the nasty feeling of rejection started to take over me even more.

It felt like the beginning.

I couldn't stand to think about this anymore, I had to get away from it. I can't handle hearing it being mentioned, or anything else that had to with it.

It seemed to follow me every where, the constant reminder I had wasted my time with that disgusting, trash color thinking that it was actually "beautiful". I regret it, I regret every second being associated with that color. Then I looked down, I looked down and I nearly cried. I still had that color on me. I needed to take it off, get rid of it. I don't want that reminder on me anymore,  I need to get away from it.

I woke up this morning, no color on me. I was finally free from that garbage. Finally, gone. No more color.