I'll Be Over Here

You're just... you

1/13/15

Today went relatively the same way as yesterday. Except, I hung out with one of my new friends, "C"."C" is the sweetest and most hilarious person I have ever met. She makes me so happy, even when she tells her ridiculous puns.

The rest of the day, was the same. I spent lunch with my new friends, while getting the usual scoffs and eye rolls from my old friends.

At cheer practice I asked my old friend "OG" why everyone is annoyed/mad at me. Se responded, "You're just... you."
WHAT THE FUCK! I then said, "Well then, ok. Does everyone feel this way?" OG then responded with a firm, "Absolutely everyone."

I was taken aback by her words and my heart sunk really low in my chest. "So, it's certain parts of my personality?" I asked.  "It's everything about you," she responded.

With that, I left her standing there and started practicing our routine.

No matter what face I have on the outside, I'm broken. All along, my "closest friends" hadn't liked me one bit. AND THAT HURT. If you don't like me, don't be fake about it, BE UP FRONT AND TO MY FACE AND DON'T WAIT. I just wasted two years of my life on these motherfuckers, just to realize they don't even like me.

On a brighter note, guess who's going to winter formal with her new friends? This girl. And I got the cutest outfit. (I'll post a pic on the chapter of that day).

At school, the drama may be wrapping up, but at home, things are worsening. Two years ago, my parents got a divorce because my dad cheated on my mom, four times. Whoops. Anyway, my mom remarried and my dad is getting engaged to the woman he cheated with.

The main problem is that my dads girlfriend has two sons "J" and "S", both are super annoying. "J", is the worst of the two. Turns out, he's moving in!!! FUCK MY LIFE. I hate this kid with a burning passion. My hatred is fueled by the fires of hell.  HE IS 13 AND STILL BUYS LEGOS AND POKEMON CARDS. Not to mention, he brings them EVERYWHERE. Also, "J" thinks in funny to shoot me in the face with his fucking nerf guns. Like dude, you aren't 8 years old, grow up.

So, he might be moving in... But, it gets worse. He will be going to my school. And guess who's responsible for making him feel welcome? That's right, me. Bow down to the queen
of embarrassment.

I hate this. I wish I could control every aspect of my life. If I had my way, my parents would be together, I would be pretty, I would have tons of friends, and I would marry Calum Hood. But NO. There is a little something called God in the way.

Alright, I'm done moping see ya!

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Later on 1/13/16

Guess who can't wear her new winter formal dress? This girl.

My dad told me it didn't "flatter my body." He might as well have called me fat. Thanks dad, that really helps with my self esteem.

Whatever, what can I expect from a man who disrespects woman like its his sole purpose.