Unworthy

Chapter 1.3

As soon as Thor was exiled they looked to me to blame since I was the one whom told Heimdall to inform father of our plan. If it wasn't for his interference we would have perished. His insolence nearly set forth a second war between Jotunhem and Asgard. I was given the thrown when Asgard needed a King; they were the ones who committed treason.

I loved my brother, more then I let on but I respected the Kings decision. Thor needed to learn he was thickheaded and not fit to take the responsibility of sitting on that thrown. But I never meant any harm to the one's I cared about but my word is meaningless, only to be heard as the silver tongued liar. I just wish the other could see the light in me and not just the dark. I mean well I really do but no one could see it. They take me as the jealous and greedy brother that only cares for himself. The way I was raised was to believe a Kings duty is to his people. Not to himself. Thor didn't understand that. All he wanted was the glory of battle. Father saw that. I saw that. If only everyone else could see it too.

In the end he returned, changed but blinded none the less. They didn't understand. All I wanted was what was best, but none of them could see it. I was the bad guy. I was always the bad guy, the silver tongued liar that stood in the shadow of the golden child. But I'm not just that. I'm not a cheat, a liar, or a thief.. I'm not a bad person. It's just.. No one understood.

He came back and I was the villain. There were traders all around me, not a single person believed in me anymore. Although my intentions were justified my actions couldn't be any farther from the fact. Destroying Jotunhem could have solved all of our issues, no more fear of war. We'd finally be rid of those monsters from are nightmares once and for all. I wanted to prove myself to father, that I wasn't one of them. In the end I ended up becoming something far from a frost giant and even farther from an Asgardian. I became a monster in my own sense, a hurt and vengeful one. I didn't know where I belonged. I was the bad guy.

I challenged my brother knowing I could never hurt him. I loved him with all my heart even if I had been living in the shadow of his greatness. He had to learn that what I needed to do was for the greater good, if things had escalated any further there would be need to send troops to do battle. Countless lives that would be lost in vain, why would we do that when it would be safer just to eliminate the threat altogether? Hopefully with time he would figure it out on his own. I could only hope. If he ever wanted to be a good king he would need to be able to make tough choices like that in order to protect the people.

He made his decision. By now I've come to realize the error of my ways, the easy the thing to do wasn't always the right thing to do. Our people would be spared but at the cost of an entire world that was not involved. No true king could ever be that heartless. The idea of being a monster has driven Loki to this point, where his judgment was a blind as the rage that fuelled it.

We were left hanging from the bridge, no one but Thor preventing me from falling into oblivion. No one understood me but I saw the look in his eyes, he still believed in me but only a bit. There was no place for me in Asgard anymore. So I let go. Not knowing where I would fall to but I didn't care. How was I supposed to know I would end up at that place, with that tyrant.