Sex. Did that caught your attention? good, because I've been screaming sex and penis in the wide hallway, on the football field and the boys locker rooms for an experimental project for my psychology class, titled " How many virgins are left in the planet."
And no the teacher wasnt in favor with my chosen topic, but who fucking cares I'm sweet Emily Woods. I can do anything and control everything because I'm nicccee.
Rule no 1 to popularity amongst useless human apes: be nice to them
and when you gain their trust, seize a moment to crush them.
I know what you're thinking, I bet it sounds like "oh what a cold bitch." "I dont wanna hear no spoiled white girl story." Guess what, you're here and if you don't want nothing about it then you are free to go.
Not leaving? then good very good I like you already.
I'm Emilia Vanderbilt Woods or also known as Emily Woods. Been a goddess since birth and I plan to stay that way, as sparkling fabulous as possible. I'm the president of Alpha Pi Delta an elite sorority for girls here at Harvard University. So you see this is not one of those typical white girl story I have the looks and a brain that a zombie will notice.
In a word my life is perfect so perfect that people try to tear it down. But hey just chill its impossible to do that because people wont bring it upon themselves to even think that, sweet and kind Emily could do such a thing.
A shriek was heard in the hall way and everyone, including me turned around to see who it was.
"YOU FILTHY DIRTY WITCH!" oh look its neck brace Brenda. She pointed her finger at me and started to charge at my direction. Her thin brown hair in pigtails and her eyes fueled with rage. As she came nearer and nearer I can't help but notice her outfit... tennis shoes with thick knee socks on each of her beefy legs, red wool skirt, tucked in with her white polo and checkered blazer. Barf.
"Hello Brenda what a lovely afternoon it is." I gave her my nicest smile. She was huffing and puffing like an over boiled kettle about to explode.
"YOU DID THIS!"
" Did what exactly Brenda are you--"
"YOUBURNEDMYTHESISPAPERWORK!" she said it all to fast and loud that people started to gather in a circle around us. So what if I did? it deserves to be in ashes anyways.
"Thesis, you started already?" I said faking my shock. "Brenda I would never do that at all."
"I saw you I FUCKING saw you breaking in my locker, got my thesis papers and use it as a little bonfire!"
And toilet paper Brenda. It was pretty good paper too. Im so sorry I didn't want to be second best with anything, especially to you Brenda Diaz.
A tear escaped my eye as I started to cry. Immediately my colleagues flocked to me and handed me tissue.
This attention that I'm having I love it. So I figured I should cry more... lol more like wail painfully as if like my pet husky princess died.
"Brenda look what you did you made Em cry." Stefania the girl from my law class shot Brenda a glare then turned to me "Oh honey dont cry everybody knows you couldnt do those things."
"But--- its just sad for Brenda to accuse me of such horrid acts, all I wanted was to be friends with her." I said in the most real cry voice I can produce. Its so real that I can convince everyone to hand me the Oscar.
"YOURE LYING! SHES A LIAR!" she protested.
"BRENDA SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU ARE NOTHING BUT AN UGLY BULLY!" Stefania screamed.
By then the murmurs grew louder and it mostly sounded like "psycho neck brace on the loose." "Shes accusing saint emily."
I bet Brenda heard it too because that was when she snapped out of her tantrum and for the first time noticed everyone around her. With her face flushed in what appears to be guilt, she contained her self and walked away.
With that everyone cheered and went to me to exchange their encouragements and thoughts on Brenda.
"I'm okay as long as I have you all supporting me. And I hope you dont go hard on Brenda maybe she's just having a bad day. And even with all this it wont stop me to win her over as my friend." See? what did I tell you. I get away with everything. *evil laughs*
*************************************
It's 3 am and everyone in the campus is asleep. But me? I'm just pouring gasoline on this little tree house a few yards away from Harvard. Why this little tree house? well its Brenda's secret venue for her club in campus called "Salvation Poets" like the one in dead poets society kind of club, but you know with the difference
of Robin Willams is awesome and they suck.
"I could have showed mercy if you didnt make such a fuzz about it neckbrace." I said lighting up a little nice spark of fire from a lighter. "But you just have a big mouth so..." I threw the lighter purposely and immediately the entire tree house lit up. "Oopss guess Stefania needs to be more cautious about where to place her lighters."
With that said I got my ipod, my headphones in my ears and turned up the music as loud as I can. And well just walk away from everything that Brenda have... had.
YOU ARE READING
How to make a loser love you
Novela JuvenilCollege sorority president Emily Woods is everyones dream girl she's nice, rich, pretty and bubbly at least that's what everyone thinks, but behind that goody good facade is a secret mean bitch. When her cover was threatened to be exposed by campus...
