Over Again

Chapter Thirteen

I hadn’t seen Harry in over a year, and suddenly I was back in London for my Dad’s wedding. If I’m going to be completely honest, I was terrified of facing the boy I left behind. Or was he the one who left me? Either way, I felt like I was a child being forced into interacting with long lost relatives over the phone. Except this person wasn’t a relative and it was going to be face to face. The morning of the wedding was a blur, there were too many people doing too many things all at once and before I knew it I was standing at the alter beside my new step mother and her other bridesmaids. During the ceremony I found myself constantly glancing at the crowd of people. He was here, I was sure of it. I had several people asking me about him throughout the day. Is the world famous pop star going to be here and was he going to be my date and is it true he cheated on me? Of course I brushed it all off, reminding them that today wasn’t about me. Yet I still knew he was somewhere in that large church. I just had that feeling someone was watching me. I mean of course there were hundreds of people watching me, except I was sure they were all focused on the bride and groom. All except one. I couldn’t find him in the church; during the ceremony and after, but I knew he was there. I didn’t have time to look for him, not that I was going to anyways, because soon I was being rushed to the hotel where the reception was being held. Once all the speeches were said, and the dances were danced everyone was free to do whatever they pleased. I spotted Harry while I said my brief obligatory speech, causing me to stutter. Typical. But I soldiered on and eventually held up a glass of wine to signify the end of my time on centre stage. I don’t know what was wrong with me, because I knew in the back of my mind that I was desperate to see Harry again but for some reason only god knows I would do, I found myself avoiding that beautiful boy. I only managed to avoid him for about twenty minutes before I realized he was charming the pants off anyone who talked to him and sweet-talked his way out of uncomfortable conversations. I noticed him making his way over to me so naturally, I power walked towards the ladies bathrooms. Apparently I should’ve run because Harry somehow managed to corner me in a secluded hallway. My back leaned against the wall as he towered over me, his hands placed firmly on the wall on either side of my shoulders making it quite difficult to make a quick escape.

“If you’re trying this hard to avoid me you might as well have uninvited me today,” Harry said, his voice huskier than I remembered. Although his face was a little too close for comfort, I didn’t say a thing. I guess deep down I’d missed that physical contact between us.

“I wasn’t trying to avoid you,” I denied his accusation. I stared at his tie, unable to look into his eyes because I could tell he had that sultry look in them I wouldn’t be able to resist.

“Then how come you haven’t spoken to me all day?”

“I haven’t spoken to you all year.” I corrected him with a sarcastic grin.

“I missed you, George.” Harry whispered before locking his lips with mine. For a moment I just let it happen. I sunk into the deep kiss because for as long as I could remember that’s all I ever wanted. But I’d had a guard up ever since my plane landed at Heathrow Airport two days ago. It took all my physical and emotional strength to push Harry away. He took a step back and I took that chance to run. I picked up the hem of my silk gown and ran down the hall. I hadn’t even realized I was crying until I came across a door with a blurry sign. I wiped my eyes, ‘Loading Dock: Authorised Personnel Only’. I pushed the door open anyways, the brisk wind hitting me like a truck. I sat down at the edge of the concrete dock, my feet hanging off the wall. I just cried my heart out until I heard the door swing open behind me. To my surprise it was just a security guard. I think he felt bad because once he saw me crying he just let me sit there for a while before leaving as he mumbled some words into his radio. A few seconds passed and I heard the door swing open again and this time I knew who it was. Harry sat beside me without saying anything. He just pushed his feet off the wall below us and swung his legs back and forth.

“You shouldn’t have done that,” I told him.

“What?”

“Kissed me.”

“Oh. Sorry…” He replied.

“We’re not even together any-“ Harry cut me off.

“Actually, you know what? I’m not sorry. I’ve wanted to do that since the day you left. I think a year or so is enough waiting.”

“But we’re not together anymore, Harry.” I reminded him.

He turned to face me now, and my eyes were automatically drawn to his. “Who gives a shit? Just because we aren’t in a relationship does not change my feelings for you. Don’t you think the fact that I’m still ridiculously in love with you after all this time means something?” I fleetingly looked away, fidgeting with my fingers. “You can’t tell me you don’t feel the same otherwise you wouldn’t have been avoiding me, and don’t you dare tell me that you weren’t avoiding me because you are the worst liar in the history of the planet.”

“One week. That’s all I have. One god damned week. And then I have to leave again for another six months. I can’t let myself love you like I did just for it all to be ruined after a week. No. It hurt way too much the last time, Harry. I won’t let myself.” I admitted the reason I’d been avoiding him.

“So you just won’t let yourself feel anything?” He asked me. I shook my head no.

“Not for another six months anyway.” I replied.

“What about me? What am I supposed to do? Just wait for you??” Harry sounded so shocked, as if waiting was something impossible.

“If you want to be with me…I guess so. But I’m not telling you that you have to.” I reassured him.

“Of course I’ll wait for you! I just…I don’t know what I’ll do without you for the next six months.”

I was dumbfounded. He had no idea how hypocritical he was sounding. “I waited for you, didn’t I? I always waited for you to come back. You’d be gone for months at a time but every time you came home I’d be there. Waiting. So you should be able to do the same if you really wanted to.”

Harry sighed, looked at something in the distance for a moment, before turning his attention back to me and holding up his pinkie finger. “What?” I asked, confused.

“We’ll make it official.” He said as he grabbed my wrist so I could link my pinkie with his. “I’ll wait for you.”