Over Again

Chapter Eleven

I had just broken the news to Emily over the phone about the false positive when Harry came bounding into our apartment, pulling his suitcases behind him. “I was hoping you’d be at the airport with El – “ He stopped in his tracks when he found me lying on the couch, puffy eyed and in my pyjamas.

“Hi,” I sniffed. As excited as I was to see him, I wasn’t sure if I should tell him about the pregnancy test. So I just kept quiet. Harry dropped his bags and immediately made his way beside me, cuddling me into him. Maybe it was my hormones, but when his scent engulfed my senses, it was just too much for me to handle. I’d missed him so much and I just wish he’d been there when I took the test so I wouldn’t have to explain anything. I broke down into ugly sobs while Harry hugged me tighter, running his fingers through my knotted hair.

“Shh…what’s wrong Georgie?” He said calmly.

“I just missed you so much,” I sobbed even louder into his chest. Which was true. I’d missed having his presence in general.

“You don’t have to cry, I’m here now.” Even though I couldn’t see his face, I could hear the smile in his voice. I guess we were both worrying about the same thing. See, long distance relationships have two problems; you never know if the other person’s missing you or if they’re forgetting you. And even though Harry and I aren’t actually living in two different places, it felt like that sometimes because the band is away quite often.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” He asked once I’d calmed down enough.

I nodded and that was the end of that conversation. I’ve always loved that Harry knows when to stop asking questions, he knows when you don’t want to talk about something so he doesn’t force it out of you because he knows that people will eventually tell him things if they need to in their own time.

-      A month later -

“I’m sure you’ll pass,” Harry handed me a glass of wine to calm my nerves.

I sat anxiously in front of the laptop screen, refreshing my email every ten seconds. The test results that will determine my future career would be appearing on my screen at 8:00pm. I glanced at the time in the corner of the screen – 7:58pm. I tapped at the refresh button a couple more times, taking a sip of white wine. At exactly 8:01pm an email from the cooking school appeared in my inbox.

“Oh god, I can’t look. You do it Harry.” I looked up at him towering over me, most of his weight leaned on the hand gripping onto the kitchen counter while he took control of the cursor. I buried my face in his t-shirt as he read my results out to me.

“Theoretical Test – B plus.” He said. I felt my head turning slowly towards the screen. “Practical Test – A plus.” I felt his body relax as he turned away from the screen. A massive wave of relief filled my body and I finally read the email to make sure Harry wasn’t lying. And there it was. I’d gotten through! My eyes immediately fell to the paragraph underneath my test results as Harry slowly paced the room.

“Congratulations Miss Georgia Young, you have passed your year at Le Cordon Bleu Culinary School with outstanding results.” I began to read aloud. “We are pleased to inform you that you have been offered a paid internship at…” I stopped reading the email to Harry, causing him to look up. He’d obviously read this part too. There was a look in his eyes that I’d only seen in him a few times. It was a look of fear; a fear that he was about to lose something important to him. Before I could begin to say anything, he spoke up.

“You should take it.” He said bluntly.

“Harry…”

“No, Georgia. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity. You’d be an idiot not to accept it.” His voice was so stern.   

“It’s in Australia!” I was standing so close to him now, shouting right at his god damn face. “I haven’t even had time to think about it and I don’t have to! It’s too far away. And I can’t be away for EIGHTEEN MONTHS…I can’t be away from you for that long.”

“Why are you thinking about me?! Think about yourself for once, George! Don’t even feel bad for leaving because I was the one that convinced you to apply in the first place, remember?” He sounded angry. Not at me, but at himself.

I sighed and took a step away from him. “Do you want me to leave?” I asked, my eyebrows furrowing.

He scoffed, “Of course not. But I want you to achieve your dreams, just like I have. You’ve wanted this for as long as I can remember and I don’t want to be the thing holding you back.”

I can’t believe this. I’m actually offended at how set he is on making me accept the job. He’d made my decision for me before I could even consider it. “Is that what happened with you?” I asked directly. “Is that why you ignored me after you auditioned for X-factor? Was I the thing holding you back?” I looked him right in the eyes as the words left my mouth and I regretted them immediately. God, I never knew I was still this bitter about it.

“No…you know that’s not what I meant! Jesus Christ, I just want the best for you, okay? If you want to live your life stuck in boring old Cheshire, then fine. Do what you want.”

“Fuck you!” I’ve never yelled something so loud and so full of anger in my entire life.

I turned around and stormed out of our apartment, making sure to slam the door on my way out. There was one photographer waiting outside our building, who seemed pretty disappointed that I wasn’t the international pop star he was waiting for but took one photo anyway. I let the bright flash blind me for a second before walking out into the rain, shoving my hands into the pocket of my coat, which I’d practically ripped off the hooks by the door. I walked around the city for a while, letting the skies pour down angrily on me. By the time I’d made my decision, I found myself standing outside Danielle and Liam’s apartment building. It made sense – I’d made an automatic connection with Dani, it just felt comfortable to talk to her about everything. I knew how late it was and it would be rude to just barge in on the two uninvited, but I was desperate.

When I knocked on their door, I was surprised at how quick it flew open. Like they were expecting me. Before I could get a word in, Liam pulled me into their apartment and hugged me. Not even caring about how cold and damp my clothes were. Dani ran into the hall with her phone in her hand and sighed heavily before dialling a number. It all suddenly felt like that time I ran away from home when I was twelve (which only lasted a few hours before my parents found me hiding in Harry’s room).

“Harry told us what happened,” Danielle said as she handed me some of her dry clothes to change into. “He’s so worried.”

“It’s been like six hours, what a drama queen.” I joked as I closed the door to the bathroom, turning on the hot tap in the shower. “I’m really sorry for showing up un-announced, by the way. I just really needed to get away from…well, him.” I said as I stepped out of the ensuite bathroom, only to stop in my tracks as soon as I saw who was sitting on the bed.

“That’s nice to know.” Harry stated sarcastically.

I sighed as I sat down beside him. “I didn’t mean it like that.” The thirty-second silence between us was full of tension. “I made up my mind.” I said quietly, causing Harry to turn his head and look at me. I kept my eyes on my lap. “I knew that if I saw you right after I’d made my final decision, I’d change my mind straight away because I can’t stand the thought of leaving you.”

“What?” He asked. “What do you mean…”

“I’m going to Australia, Harry. And we both know this relationship isn’t going to survive when we’re that far away from each other for that long.”