Random Short Stories

The Miniscule Red Turtle's Near Death Experience

This story could also be called how I believe the world shall end.

One day the miniscule red turtle walked to the beach. It was so miniscule that people thought it was a poisonous turtle spider, reported to be in parts of a certain river in Trinidad, but this turtle spider was in Mini-sota (get it? =D). 'LOL that was a good joke' said the turtle spider, which happens to be light blue, not red. Or green. Or turtle colour. Anyway, the roman rubber chicken god called 'Roman Rubber Chicken God' shouted from the heavens and said, 'let the giant truck-sized rubber chickens rule!' Therefore the rubber chickens ended up killing all the humans in every part of the world including such tiny hidden away places such as Brazil, France, and even Australia! In the end the minisclue red turtle did not have a near death experience, he just had a death experience. But you thought this was over! No! The miniscule red turtle was squashed yes, but 2 different sex DNA's floated into the air and into space.

5 years later...

Rubber Chicken Journal: 23rd April

I'm suprised us rubber chickens can tell the date, but now we won't anymore! Poisonous turtle spiders from a certain river in Togo (or is it Djibouti?) ARE INVADING US FROM THE SKIES AND RIPPING OUR HEADS OFF AND NOW I AM STILL TYPING EVEN THOUGH NOW I AM CERTAINLY DEAD AS THERE IS A RUBBER CHICKEN NEAR ME NOW I AM GOING TO DIE

(see giant rubber chicken image at top)