A Very Barker Alphabet

Alphabet Poem

A is for Abel who fell under a train

B is for Brian who had worms of the brain

C is for Claus who was born with no bowels

D is for Dimitri who was eaten by owls

E is for Eddy who was subject to fits. and so was his twin

Freddy who chopped him to bits, Freddy was hanged for killing's most grim

Then the hangman called George killed himself on a whim

H is for Holly who sang like a lark

I shot her myself while hunting by dark

J is for Jacqueline. Oh what a glutton. She kept sheep as pets and choked on the mutton

K is for Kat who once ate a rat

Locked Lou in a cage, and force fed him raw fat

M is for Mat the boy who fought back, then freed Lou from the cage, and hit Kat with a bat

N is for Neville who summoned the Devil

O is for Olly who tortured a dolly

Till Polly the dolly turned the knife back on Olly

Q is for Quinn who once shed his skin

R is for Roger the dead Siamese twin

T is for Tracey who was buried alive

Uma was too, but she didn't survive

V is for Violet, born with no brain

Whilst William was tortured and driven insane

X is for Xander who shaved with a sander

Y is for Yas who married her salamander

And finally there's Zeke, the boy with a beak, he ran away from home and joined a circus of freaks.