Chapter One-Harry
I flinch as another flash goes off in my face and I squint into the dark as yellow circles begin to form in my vision.
“Harry! Harry! Over here, Harry!”
I ignore them and keep walking to the waiting car outside the hotel, making eye contact with as few people as possible.
Glancing to my right I notice Liam stop to pose with a fan and Louis was talking animatedly to a reporter. Niall and Zayn were talking amongst themselves as they smile and wave to the screaming females pressed against the barriers.
‘Bloody hell…’ I mutter to myself as I pull open the door of the big black car parked on the road.
Sighing, I sink into my seat and allow my tense body to relax. I am alone, finally.
“Did you see that one girl’s sign! Lads, I blushed!” Niall laughed, as he slid into the seat infront of me after the other four boys. I hadn’t noticed Louis slip in next to me and I turned and smiled half-heartedly, acknowledging his presence.
Louis was always the same, the happy-go-lucky best friend every guy wishes for. His personality is flawless, allowing him to pull off the wild, free-spirited disposition, yet unknown to many people, he is the best person to talk to when in need of a friend.
“You okay, Harry-bear?” he asks, concern filling his eyes.
All the boys turn to face me and I immediately feel uncomfortable as they all sit waiting for answers to my behavior recently.
It was true, my behavior had been terrible and I was ashamed. I looked out the window at the London buildings we passed and sighed again before looking back at them and smiling reassuringly.
“I’m great, mate.”
Liam looked unconvinced and I rolled my eyes as he began to speak.
“I don’t know, Hazza…are you sure? You haven’t been yourself lately and I think people are starting to notice. What’s up? Are you sick or something?”
“Yeah,” Niall broke in. “You’ve been really quiet in interviews too.”
“Maybe that is because I don’t like everything I say twisted into a new story that are false, Niall!” I snapped, instantly regretting it as I watch the blonde retreat, pain visible on his face.
I closed my eyes and groaned, I shouldn’t have snapped at Niall and I felt guilty already.
“Ag, I’m sorry, Niall, I didn’t mean it, mate.”
Niall simply nodded and turned around in his seat to face the front. I allowed him to sulk, knowing sooner or later he would get over it.
“Niall’s right though, Haz, you have also been really distant from the fans.” Zayn said, softly.
“-and us.” Louis added.
Louis’ words shattered my heart into a million little pieces as I heard the hurt in his voice. I had been a horrible friend! Louis and Eleanor had recently gone through a very messy break-up and I wasn’t there for him the way he was there for me when even something small went remotely wrong. I was slowly pulling myself away from the boys and only now had I realized.
“Everything is fine, boys, I promise I’m okay, just have a lot on my mind right now, I guess.”
They all continued staring at me, waiting for me to elaborate. I chose not to and casually shrugged before shifting my body and looking out the window again.
“Okay.” Louis spoke first, patting my back soothingly. “We are always here for you mate.”
The car was once again filled with casual banter about crazy fans, hotel food and cars, and I allow my mind to completely block them out for the duration of the ride back to our homes.
“Bye, Harry!”
“Bye, Hazza!”
“Bye!”
“Bye, Harry-bear! See you tomorrow!”
I climbed out the car and said a quick goodbye to the boys before turning and facing my dark apartment. The weather had turned again and the clouds were threatening to spill at any moment. Great.
“Harry! Do you mind if we have a picture with you!”
Two teenage girls had emerged from nowhere and I jumped at the sound of the voices breaking me out of my thoughts and echoing down my quiet street.
“Sure.” I said, trying my best to smile at the young blondes.
One looked about twelve, the other maybe fourteen, however it was obvious they were sisters.
I placed my arm around the youngest and bent down, placing my face close to hers and smiling as best I could, then waiting as they switched positions before repeating the actions.
“Thank you so much, Harry!” The eldest girl grinned.
“Yeah, thanks! You are my favorite!”
For the first time in what felt like forever I smiled genuinely.
“Thanks, love.”
They ran off giggling and I turned and quickly walked up the concrete pathway to the big wooden door. Taking my key out my pocket I quickly unlocked and slipped inside before I was bothered by anymore fans.
My apartment was cold and dark and I shivered as I walked through the quiet entrance hall, turning lights on as I walked.
“Oh my God! He’s home! Harry! Harry! Harry!”
I groaned and glanced very briefly out a nearby window at the substantial amount of girls gathering on the side walk. I left the window before any of them saw me and made my way down the passage to my bedroom. My luxurious furniture was uncomfortable and cold to touch and the gigantic apartment didn’t seem to posses the feeling of ‘home.’
“Hey, Mom, just thought I would try call you, but understand you are probably busy right now, so don’t worry about calling me back. Yes, before you ask, everything is fine I am healthy and going to bed on time.”
I smiled at the thought of my paranoid mom watching her youngest child travelling the world at the tender age of eighteen.
Sitting down on my double bed I bent down and began taking off my shoes as I continued talking to my Mom’s voicemail.
“I have literally just got back from the tour and am about to go make dinner, and I have to unpack too! See you soon. I love you, Mom. Say hi to Gem for me.”
I hung up the phone and tossed it on my bed before kicking my shoes off and padding to the kitchen, feeling my skin getting goose bumps as my feet made contact with the cold marble floor.
Opening the fridge I observed its contents. Milk-probably sour, steak-way too old, defiantly off, cheese-hard and flakey and apples.
‘Apple it is then.’ I thought to myself, quickly writing a reminder on the fridge magnet notebook to go shopping first thing tomorrow.
Walking back into my cold room I took another bite of my apple before flopping down onto my back on the hard bed.
When did my life become like this?
All I have come to know is big black cars and empty hotel rooms, people who think they know me, camera flashes and fashion designers, photographers and reporters, flashy cars and expensive clothes.
This isn’t what I wanted for my life! I wanted to sing and have fun, do what I love! I wasn’t expecting it to be like this. I didn’t think it would be so lonely
