The Way Things Were

A Fresh Start

  "Why not just call me by my name?"

I rolled my eyes. "Because 'Ross' is such a boring name, no offense. What's your middle name?"

"You tell me yours and I'll tell you mine."

What are you playing at, Ross?

"You drive a hard bargain, but okay. My full name is Emery Solana Davidson. Now fess up O'Donovan."

"Ross Kenry O'Donovan."

I immediately started laughing at that. I'm roommates with fucking RKO!

"Make fun of it all you want, I don't even care." He sighed, putting his hands up in defeat.

I tried to stop laughing, only it was too hard. "It's not that it's," I took a breath through more laughs, "it's not stupid or anything. It's just," more laughs, "You're RKO!"

He looked at me, utterly confused.
Does he really not get it?

"You know, RKO? The RKO?"

Still nothing.
He really doesn't know.

"Are you on drugs?" He asked, quirking an eyebrow.

"Randy Orton! For fucks sake! RKO is Randy Keith Orton! He's a famous wrestler! Have you really not heard of him?" I sighed, exasperated.

"Like I said, animation is more my deal. I never watched much wrestling. I watched more cartoons, you know. Besides, Australia has its own sports and they all suck."

I rolled my eyes and sat down on the couch.

"You've got an accent yourself. Glad to know I'm not the only foreigner around here." He added.

"I'm not full English, sure, but that doesn't mean I'm a foreigner. I'm one-third Italian, so the accent shines through on occasion. I mean, I'm really one-half Italian because of my dad, whereas my mom's English-Italian. Technically, I'm one-third Italian, but it's more like one-half."

"Can you say anything in Italian?" His eyes lit up with childish delight.

There was no way I could resist this moment. "Sei un idiota , ma ho un po 'come te . Allora cosa ne dici? Amici?"

"It means 'You're an idiot, but I kind of like you. So, what do you say? Friends?'" I quickly added.

"Yeah, friends. But that's so cool! I wish I knew another language."

"Sei solo geloso perché il Paese non ha parole fredde o lingue perché l'Australia è fondamentalmente il paese peggiore di sempre paese." I quickly smirked.

He looked at me, confused.

I'm really getting used to his confused look, fuck.

"You're just jealous because your country doesn't have any cool words or languages because Australia is basically the worst country to ever country." I translated.

My Italian always comes out at the worst times.

Instead of anger, which I thought Ross would be portraying since I just insulted his native country, he laughed. His face contorted into a huge smile that followed up to his eyes.

"This is why I like you, Emery. You're not afraid to be yourself, and it's just awesome."

I titled my head in questioning. "I insult where you're from, and you say you like me...? Is something wrong with you, Ross? Are you on drugs, or something?"

"No, I'm not on drugs. Believe me, I would definitely tell you if I was."

I rolled my eyes and pulled my phone out of my pocket. "My friends calling me again, sorry."

He nodded and went into his room.

"What's up Suze?"

"I told Dan about you, and he thinks you're cool."

"Do our roommates know each other or something? Because Ross said the same thing, after I insulted where he's from. The insult was in Italian, too."

"Hold on. Let me ask him. Maybe they do know each other. What's Ross' last name?"

"O'Donovan."

There was a pause and mumbled words before Suzy's voice came back through the phone.

"Dan says he doesn't know anyone named Ross."

"Ok, there's one mystery solved. Not that I don't miss you or anything, but why'd you call anyway?"

"Oh, right! Well, I'm having a party tonight. Ok, not actually a party, more like a get-together. I'm inviting you and your roommate, and Dan has a couple friends, that go here of all places, and he's inviting them. You'll come right, Em?"

I took the phone away from my ear so that I could think about it for a minute, without Suzy nagging me about my answer. 

"Yeah, I'll be there, and so will Ross."

"Great! Oh, thank you so much Em! I don't know what I would do without you!"

Probably be best friends with some other person who has dyed hair and sounds condescending and sarcastic whenever they speak.

"Yeah, yeah. You're welcome, Suzy."

"Oh! I almost forgot; you and Dan will get along great."

"And, what makes you say that?"

"He's also from New Jersey, Em."

"Someone else came from that shitty state!?"

I could practically hear Suzy rolling her eyes as she answered, "I know you're excited Emery."

"Please tell me he has the dumb accent, too!" I was practically freaking out at this point. Maybe this guy wouldn't be so bad, after all.

"Yeah, but it doesn't bother me as much because I've had to deal with your weird ass Italian-Jersey accent."

I shrugged my shoulders and sighed, "True, but you love me anyway, Suze."

"I mean, I guess."

"Anyway, I better go tell Dipshit Mc. Lameass that I made plans for he and I tonight. So, see you later Suzy."

"Bye Em." 

I hung up the phone and knocked on Ross' door. "I hope you don't have any plans tonight O'Donovan, because I just made us some."

_________________________________

"Wait, wait, wait!" Ross interjected, waving his arms around.

I turned towards him and sighed. "Yes?"

"You called me 'Dipshit Mc. Lameass!? We knew each other for less than a day and that's what you called me!?"

"At least it wasn't 'Kangaroo boy'." I shrugged.

"But you are a dipshit, Ross." Arin smiled.

"Not to mention that you were fine with me insulting Australia, you know, the place that you're from, after knowing each other for less than a day." I smirked, putting my hand on Arins shoulder.

"God dammit Ross." Dan sighed, shaking his head.

"Barry, what's the verdict?" I questioned.

"All those in favor of Ross being a dipshit?" He stood up, gesturing towards the crowd.

Numerous hands went up, including mine, Dans, Arins and Barry's.

"All opposed?"

I glanced around looking for the opposing side, but finding that Ross was the only one that raised his hand.

"Looks like the courts in agreement then."

I nodded towards Ross. "Sorry, buddy."

He mumbled something that sounded  kind of like 'Yeah, yeah. Whatever', so I decided to continue with the story.

___________________________