Starr Academy: Year Two

Starr Academy: Year Two- Chapter 36

Thirty-Six


    My heart was pounding as I waited. How would he take my decision? I didn’t know how I was going to take telling him. At the moment, I was trying to keep my emotions in check so I could talk to Marek.

    I jumped slightly when the long waited for knock came from my door. Taking a deep breathe to settle my racing heart, I bid them enter. Marek came in with a smile and even something in his hands. My heart tightened knowing that it was my belated birthday present he had in his hands. That just twisted my gut even more.

    He came over to me and hugged me. “I was beyond happy that you messaged me.” He pulled back and gave me a light kiss on my lips.

    I swallowed a little as I gestured to my bed. “Can we sit down? I want to talk.”

    Marek nodded as he sat down on the edge of my bed as he held my hand. His thumb rubbed a soft circle on the back of my hand. “How are you now that you’ve had some time to think?”

    With a deep breathe, I nodded. “Better. My emotions aren’t so all over the place like they were.” I looked him in his eyes. “I haven’t yet said this and forgive me, but thank you for saving me. You risked so much to save my life.”

    He smiled bringing my hand up to his lips. “I’d do it again if I was asked.” He gave my hand a kiss.

    I nodded. “But still, thank you.”

    He smiled that sweet smile of his. "You above all are most welcome." I looked down and he tilted my chin up. "You alright?"

    A sigh slipped out. "I don't know where to begin."

    "How about with this?" He brought the gift around and placed it in my hands. "I had to get you something very special for you to make up for everything."

    I looked at him feeling my insides twist. "Marek..." I shook my head handing it back. "I don't know if I can accept that gift."

    He rose and came over to me. "Why not?"

    Taking a deep breathe, I turned to him. "Because of what I decided."

    In that moment I think Marek realized what I just implied. "Oh..." He sank back down on the edge of my bed. His heart right out there for me to see.

    "I'm sorry, but I think I shouldn't be in a relationship now. What happened told me that maybe I'm not ready and need to grow more before I take that leap again. Trust me that I wish never to hurt you, but I can deny this feeling any longer."

    He nodded hanging his head. "Trust me I get what you're saying." He sighed. "I had a feeling this was what was going to happen."

    I felt the first tear fall from my eyes. "I wish we could have stayed together, but I just needed too much more time before I'm ready again."

    He looked up and then rose coming over to me. He took my shoulders in his hands. "I completely understand. You wen through something that few have and survived. Taking a step back could be more than a good thing for you to do right now. I won't lie and say that my heart is broken over this, but I have hope. One day we could be together again and it be even better then right now."

    I sniffled. "But what if that never happens."

    He gave me a tortured smile. "That is for us to find out. I have faith and care for you more than even for my own self." I looked in his eyes and saw the pain I was causing that he was giving off too.

    Seeing that nearly crushed me. A few more tears came out along with some sniffles as I tried not to break down just yet. The more he stayed, the closer I was to not ending our relationship.