Tales of a Ninja Magician: Of Where We Come From

A Silly Question to Begin A Journey

"Wait, I thought you lost your chakra control..." mother quietly tried to wrap her head around Mana's explanation of why she was packing her bags. The magician didn't give her parents that much to work with but it wasn't because of ill will, she just wanted to be ready. Ready for anything. Ready for success or for failure. Ready for safety and ready if her team would ever need a useless weakling which she currently was to pull their asses out. Mana packed her cards and stuffed the pockets and all the hidden dispensers of her uniform with them. This time she'd have to use them smart if she'd ever need to, she'd not have her father's hat to utilize this time.

"I am not leaving as a ninja on the mission, I'm leaving as a client and the team will serve as my bodyguards. It's a quite common C-Rank type mission" the magician explained with her full attention still being occupied by her stuff. Over all this time she spent completely powerless her weapons and ninja tools were all over the place seeing how they were mostly unused.

"Wait... Are you sure about this? You'll be leaving the village with a bunch of genin? Experienced genin, experienced enough to be given C-Rank missions, but genin nonetheless..." mother tried to argue, she looked at her husband who was just standing nearby for support, trying to ask him to join in on the attempt to stop her daughter from leaving the village without having recovered her ability to stand up to the threats outside of it.

"It's fine, they need my history knowledge, not my brawn. Not that there's too much currently there to be desired..." Mana growled angrily, she felt so much anger inside which she had no reasonable direction to direct it at. 

She didn't know what this anger was all about or where it came from. It was just like in the recent years she started to get angry and annoyed and outraged by everything all the time. Even the smallest injustice appeared to offend her and make her boil. It hurt having so much anger inside, the anger she had no right to release being a public idol, showed and idolized by children with parents trying to make their own kids more like she was.

"Look... Mana... I know how it feels, losing the edge, being unable to fight on that level anymore. I hope every day that what's happening with you is not forever, that it's not as final as my injury but... What I and your mother wish to say is... Don't pull anything stupid, don't try to fight like you used to. What you're going through may be temporary and you may just get your chakra manipulation back, it's definitely not worth losing your life before you do because you want to prove something to someone..."

Mana pushed her bag aside and turned at her father, she dashed up to his face and almost screamed out into it. Just barely did she manage to contain her snappy reply at the last second. He was right. Father did know what Mana was going through, he knew it far better than she did, he's been dealing with it for much longer and for him it was definitely final. All this anger, all this sadness and lack of something to fill that part of her own self.

"I know, dad..." she hugged the man instead doing her best to push that rage down, maybe it'll be useful at some point, maybe there'll be some pickle jar in need of opening. That's just about all she'd be good for at the moment. Father's eyes looked completely blissful, he must've not even noticed that the magician almost blew right into his face, her mother however instantly picked up on Mana's hidden feelings, she pushed her husband out of the way and gently placed her hands on the girls shoulder holding her closer face to face to herself.

"I know it hurts, Mana, it hurts when people need you or think you're good at something that you don't wish to take pride in. You want to be strong again, that's why you work out every time you're out of our field of vision, you're trying to put something else on top of what you lost and now people recognized it but it still hurts because it's not what you want to be known for. It's the worst. But this isn't who you are, this is temporary and you'll deal with it. Just don't make a dumb mistake that'll ruin that for you. 'Cause you will hate yourself in the end for being so rash and stupid later. When you'll get your chakra back"