Secret Admirer [h.s.]

two

Summer had gone to get some funnel cake with Michael, which left Harry alone with Aaron. They were sat in the middle of a field, where all of the town's festivities were held, on a picnic blanket as they counted down to the new year.

Tents, rides, food trucks, and people were scattered all over the place. Everything was beautiful, but Harry was having a hard time enjoying himself because he knew that he would be leaving all of this behind the next day at noon.

His parents had decided that they wanted to move back to London and he didn't get a choice in the matter because he didn't have a job so he couldn't live on his own just yet. Aaron was the only one that knew because Harry had called him immediately after his parents had told him the news.

It was ten at night and he'd called with tears streaming down his cheeks and his heartbeat erratic. A month had passed since then and he hadn't spoken a word about it because he knew that Harry didn't want him to.

Aaron sighed, he shoved his hands in his pockets and looked up at the stars, "Are you going to tell her?"

He was talking about Summer, in public they never used her real name because Harry was so hellbent on remaining anonymous.

Harry closed his eyes and sucked in a deep breath, feeling the cold air fill his lungs and creep into his skin, "Tell her what? That I'm leaving, or that I've been in love with her since we were kids?"

Aaron's gaze hadn't moved, "Both."

Harry wanted to tell her, he wanted to tell her every day since he knew that he would be leaving before graduation, but he couldn't because he was afraid. He was afraid of what she'd say when he told her that it was him that had been sending her love letters for ten years, that he'd been in love with her for as long as he could remember, and that fear kept him from coming clean because he wanted to leave her with good memories of him, not with ones that she would rethink and then not like anymore because he had loved her as more than a friend.

Harry watched as children ran back and fourth, playing games of tag as their mothers yelled at them to come back and behave. He remembered sneaking off with Summer when they were twelve, at the same place and on the same day. She'd told him that it would be fun because they could do what they wanted to and not have to worry about the grownups telling them that they couldn't do something.

So, he'd timidly followed her away from their parents and over to the rides. They'd gone on six rides before their parents had found them and, after that, they had been put on lockdown for the rest of the night.

He wished that he could go back and relive all of the moments leading up to the current one, so that he could have more time with her, even if she didn't love him the way that he loved her.

His voice sounded far away when he spoke, "No, I'm not going to tell her."

Aaron shook his head and sighed, his eyes leaving the stars and meeting with Harry's, "It's your call, man."

He looked sad, like he wanted to say something, but he didn't want to make Harry angry with him. On some level, that only made Harry feel worse.

They stood there in silence, watching the festivities around them and getting lost in their own heads. The longer that Harry had time to think, the more he thought about what would happen after he left.

"Promise me that you won't tell her after I leave?"

Harry had spoken softly, arguing with himself in his mind over what he should do; what he wanted to do. Aaron had barely heard him and it took him a moment to register what he had said, his lips pulling into a frown.