The best intentions of Alison Grayson // not edited

Rain

The best intentions of Alison greyson 

1 Corinthians 13:4-7
Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

To love thy neighbour is what I've been taught my whole life my family and friends live with this close to their hearts . But this saying never said how much to love your neighbour or who this person is .What about what gender they are I don't want to sound greedy but I can love both without questions . They say love is to do no wrongdoing ,Is it wrong to love two different pieces of people , is it wrong to ask for help on something like this , it's something I wouldn't normally ask somebody . I've been told it's best not to say things like that ,it's best to ignore and hide what have been given to me .But the thing was it wasn't chosen it was something I not freely choose ,My mother says she would love me no matter what but then back tracks to but you like boys you have from the start .So what if I have but i've liked somebody who's not boy . "It does happen overnight Eilish" she says but what if it did to me ,what if this feeling sitting in my gut was something that in a dream had suddenly woken me up .But I had always seen it but never believed it not like before not it was woken it was like whole anther person living inside of me . One night I was caught with these feelings my friend found out now she's doesnt look at me the same . It's not that I'm a freak, but it's something that makes others uncomfortable .I'm lucky nobody found out I was fourteen when I thought and feared of what would have happened if this friend spoke out about it, thankfully she kept her mouth shut . I'm glad she doesn't go to school anymore ,going to and all female school makes things harder for me . You see people my age all want something , something to talk about, something to be curious about . At my age people want to pick on people like me , make comments .People say that people only bully because something in there life sucks well . I guess i'm just as bad for the past year I've cursed , frowned ,screamed at people nobody wants to talk to an angry youth like me . I don't know why I did the things I did, but when I became like the people who riled me up I realised the damage was done . From the days that passed that I realised how I treated people I didn't want to go to school , I didn't want to face the people I had not only hurt but also let down . That year I failed school, not a lot but still, it didn't  please my father. he said if I didn't put myself up he would kick me out . Kick me out and I would have nothing , he would dump me with a bag of clothes and send me on my way . During that summer I worked part time doing filing in a hospital records into a computer . My employer told me he would have another come as well to help.I just shrugged, I didn't care I needed money I didn't promise myself anything after what my father said . My only plan was to save up enough to move out maybe somebody would come but I don't really know anyone who would . The day I was dropped off to work my father lectured me about being on my best behaviour. he wanted me to smile, not look sad . I spoke back for once "why be happy when you don't feel happy " I walked into the job on my first day at the hospital with bruised grazed across my cheek . I found it funny really, i'm in a hospital but nobody asked what had happened , I suppose it didn't matter i was here for work not causal conversation . I sat in an old office with two computers and baskets of files to type into a computer . There was another computer next to me then I heard a knock at the door .A short ginger with curls covering her freckled face "Hi I'm Alison " she had a bright smile, to be honest I hated her within the first few second . I had ignored her, kept forcing myself to focus . She just sat next to me awkward silence, the only sounds of typing and clicking of a mouse . it was slowly killing me then she began to hum ,humming something ."Is that fluoro " I asked I couldn't help it I felt like I knew that tune so well ."Yeah it's one of my favourites " she grinned . "What's yours " she mumbled playing with her hair, her face was bright red . "Traffic light is my favourite song " I laughed for some reason instantly covered my mouth with my hand . Alison giggled in her chair I frowned "What's so funny " I ask blushing .I had this tingling feeling coming back once again but this time it wasn't shameful and doubt along with it . It was light and breezy like a spring day "I never got your name" she skipped my question . "Its Eilish " I state "Your every cute Eilish"she chuckled looking back at the computer ."W-what "I stuttered  I felt nervous in the knees, suddenly the girl I unreasonably hated become the girl I didn't mind having around."Sorry but you are " she said it like a fact, plain and simple ."What's special about me ,you've only meet me a couple of hours ago "I mumbled .she sat there I think she was actually thinking about what I had said "cause it's true. you're interesting with the way you act one minute you're hating the world next you're talking about music smiling and blushing like a little girl "  She says .

Over the next few days Alison came and left work but she was always in my thoughts .I knew she was flirting with me and trying to cheer me up .But one thing I didn't understand was why .it had been two weeks since I had meet her but I didn't mind one bit she was there . We talked for hours about the band floor and who she thought was hot, the thing was . she thought the male lead singer chris bomber was hot for a moment I was jealous once again, to be honest I couldn't understand why . Talking went on and on after that. over the weeks of summer I had spent with her in a shitty office looking at computer screen in the abandoned wing of the hospital in our small town . But let me tell you Alison was somebody I had never met. Then one day she to me "Wanna go to my place " . I trusted her she was kind ,amazing ,smart "yeah sure "I had learnt that her parents were never really home but were great people in her eyes to be honest I WISH i could say the same about my parents .Her home was simple like mine, nothing flash and great it had a roof and walls .but something about her home was different from mine, she had pictures all around her house . One picture stood out to me "Are they your brothers " I asked "Yeah one of them is, the other is my brother in law Tom, he's cool "She said 'Brother in law ?" I asked "Yeah married " she laughed in duh sort of tone ."Oh right " i nodded "So your parents don't care " I asked she spoke her head "I like both " she shrugging "both what ?" I asked frantically it sound as if she was like me "I like both hot and cold tea " she lazed on her couch . I swear I had never seen my shoulder shrink to the ground so much before "right "i mumbled defeated . Had I not been listening oh great now I looked like an idiot

When spending time at her house we talked about random things like music and books . It's funny really we liked the same stuff . "What's it's like having knowing that you're openly into both genders "she asked me straightly up .she was lying on the couch still reading a book was beside her on the floor watching tv. "I'm what ?" I asked no listening to focused on the reality tv show . "what's it like to kiss a girl " she whispered in my ear, I jumped not knowing she was that close .she put her book down "Your so cute Eilish I thought you were out I couldn't help it you become my best intention to have " she whispered .I gulped nervously "I don't know what your talking about " I whispered afraid to move though racing around in my head the feels like the first day I meet her come flooding back . But i'm stopped mid freak out when I feel her soft pale lips on mine she strokes my cheek. this girl had the habit of making me red in the face because i lit up like christmas tree . But I give in the feeling was too strong those undersell words were suddenly making sense but not through speaking but actions .And let me tell you I dragged her closer to me keeping her soft kiss into teeth almost clashing together she was warm , she was soft , she was something I never had ."You have really given the best intentions anyone ever given me " I whispers out breath from her beautiful warm kiss . But to be honest once again of many times I still don't know what i want out everything ,But one thing I know for now I want alison . Alison, the girl who stopped the rain set in my brain, the clouds will always be there clouding my mind, but it seems that she stopped the thunder for now.