lives of the scarred

One: Fiona

Aching, oozing, begging for another sip. Trying to pull the bottle out of my dreams like taking candy from a baby...I can't do it. I hate children, which is why I think my mom was stupid to tell the courts that I would babysit for my community service. Obviously I was going to bring some drinks and pills I mean c'mon. I need the pills 'cuz the children irritate me and i need it for my headaches and i need the drinks to wash the pills down. What's wrong with that??? Just because i have a couple of scars does not mean I'm suicidal, they are clearly old and i haven't cut since! I just replaced it with drinking...and popping...

So long story short i got a little fucked up and passed out, not bad right? Until the stupid kid found my bottle and my pills...So he took a few sips and a few pills, maybe he was stressed out from having a witch as a mom, you can't blame me I was passed out!...then so was the kid...they had to take him to the hospital but since the witch of a mom stayed out longer than she said she would, the kid died...

Apparently he passed out ten minutes after I did and she was supposed to come back thirty minutes later but ended up being an hour an a half late, if she came when she was supposed to he wouldn't be dead right now. So see? It's her fault, everyone knows you don't leave your kid with a 17 yr old druggie. I mean, not saying I'm a druggie (if you're reading this, they said they wouldn't look into our journals unless they felt it necessary and I wasn't going to write but there was nothing else to do so yeah, anyways if your reading this now you better stop!)

Now I'm in a rehab center, except it's like for crazy people, I'm not crazy i just need my daily dose of Vicodin and daily sip(s) of Wild Turkey. I can't believe the won't even give me anything for my headaches, they give all the other kids pills! What, they aren't worried the psychos won't get addicted to Tylenol  or find a way to hide the pill in their mouth and overdose when they have enough?

Anyways, the place is called Camp Lakewood, although I call it Cruddy Lock-up cuz it really is a Cruddy Fucking lockup for crazy people. The want us to have little group sessions an if you skip the sessions or act out during them you drop a level, that's right, we have LEVELS. What is this, Kindergarten?! And don't even get me started on the food, it is literally mush room temperature 'we can't have you choking or getting burned by the food' they tell us. apparently they don't care that to do that we eat barf, I am Not the type of girl that eats this crap!

I am a seventeen year old girl who, if i may say so myself, looks like a goddamn model. I have slick wavy, jet black hair that falls to my waist. Emerald eyes, perfect teeth an have never needed braces and I'm 5'6, not short, not tall, oh yeah also i weigh 115 lbs.

So see? I'm perfect and I need to keep it that way, eating this shit is not going to help. I can't believe this is all happening to me because of some Stupid Little Child