Ashley POV
I began walking out of his house. Damn why did I have to get noticed, I just wanted to see where he went and of course me being the clumsy ass i am fell on my butt, well my knee.
I went to the sidewalk and noticed I wasn't that far from my house, but did I really want to go home right now? Not really but I guess I have no choice.
About 5 mins later im about home when I said it wasnt that far I was wrong, well kinda it wasnt distance wise its just my injured knee made the walk 10x worse.
I was relieved when I got home but at the same time I didnt want to be here. I go to open the door and guess what its locked, great. I looked under the mat for the spare key, but it wasnt there. My parents were home I could hear them bickering. I guess they locked me out, I knew I wasnt wanted.
I sat on the porch steps for a while before deciding to go on a walk. I grab my phone from my pockets and plug in my earbuds blasting some mcr.
30 mins later
I somehow got myself to the other side of town where a small bakery was, it seemed nice. I dont know why ive never been in here before. I open the door and walk in receiving glares by unknown people, they look at me in utter disgust. What did i do i mutter under my breath continuing looking around. I come to the front table thing and see a menu, I look at it for a moment amd decide im not hungry. So I walked out still wondering why I got those looks.
I started walking home still admiring the nice part of town I surprisingly havent been to.
I start getting closer to my house and see that my parents are home, what are they going to say when I get there. Pushing down my nerves I knock on the door hoping for an answer.
It takes a second then I hear heavy foot steps. I see my father open the door with force. "There you are slut, im surprised you went out like that, take that makeup of before I do it my self!" My own dad yelled in my face.
I walk up my stairs to my bedroom and I dont cry, I feel hurt my the insult but I can't cry. I guess im so used to being called names I cant show emotion anymore, but I still have to feel like im crying inside.
I start taking my makeup off like my father instructed, I don't see why me wearing makeup is a problem, for fucks sake it was a thin line of eyeliner.
After im done I decide to take a shower because I read it helps with anxiety which is something I struggle with.
2:00 am
Its 2 in the morning and i still cant sleep, all I can hear is my parents yelling about how i ruined their life and how it'd be better without me. I contemplate on whether I should get my blade out, but then I think about Kate and how if I ledt this world she'd be close behind.
She once told she couldnt live without me and now im starting to believe it, the more I talk about wanting to die the less I see her happy. She's trying to keep me alive with all shes got but I dont know if i can do it anymore. I try so hard to find the good in myself, when I cant even look at myself.
Time is passing and I still cant fall asleep, I decide to go grab my guitar. I start strumming chords when a certain one comes to mind, a chord that went with a song I wrote not to long ago. Before I know it im singing it
An ima be using italics bc shes singing idk i just was like ok
They saw her and they stared
They dont know what she goes through
If only they knew
What do they know
They laugh while I put on a show
Just the one standing in the background
Nobody sees her cry nobody hears the sound
Everybody sees a smile on her face
Nobody hears the silent tears
They dont know they dont feel the pain
Nobody, nobody knows
Why pretend so you can be seen
When its you whos so mean
I fight a war everyday inside myself
And none of you want to care or help
I try so hard to find the good in myself
When I cant even look at myself
Just the one standing in the background
Nobody sees her cry nobody hears the sound
Everybody sees a smile on her face
Nobody hears the silent tears
They dont know they dont feel the pain
Nobody, nobody knows
Maybe one day they'll grow up
Maybe one day they'll understand us
For now we'll have to live with the judgement
Just because we're not what they call perfect
Thats okay we'll be free one day
They'll leave us alone
And this world wont feel so cold
Just the one standing in the background
Nobody sees her cry nobody hears the sound
Everybody sees a smile on her face
Nobody hears the silent tears
They dont know they dont feel the pain
Nobody, nobody knows
And with that I drifted to sleep.
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An
Ik dont hate me i haven't updated in forever
Yes b4 anyone asks that is an original song i wrote with my friend ash please dont take it i beg of you
This was kinda a filler chap ik ik
Hehe cliff hanger bitches
Bye idk when i will update again
I love ur faces hoodnight
Well iy may not be night for u but whatever
YOU ARE READING
Close as Strangers (Luke Hemmings)
FanfictionAshley had problems with anxiety and depression, her parents didnt help the problem, but after she finds a calming place things start to get better. When she relizes shes not the only one there, things start to change. She and Luke are as close as s...
