Entry #4

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by PhiloSophia22

by PhiloSophia22

Dear Diary,

Today, I've just heard the most hurtful words from him…

My crush.

That feeling that you have to fake a smile to him because you don't want him to know your "little secret".

Well, that's pretty much my routine everyday.
Everytime he talks about his crush I just plug my earphones in my ear and maximize the volume.

I know.
What a foolish thing to do, right?
But you know what?
I thought I was used to this.
Sometimes, when I'm with my friends(including him, of course.), I become totally numb when he talks about his crush.

What I mean is, I know I'm being a masochist to myself.
But what can I do?
I just can't stop hurting myself in anyway possible.
I just can't stop listening to what he says everytime.

I guess, I just want reality/truth to slap me hard in the face so I can wake up to the fact that he, can never, EVER love me. Ever...

Pathetic, right?
Sad, but True.

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A/N: so hey guys, I just want you all to know that this story is based on my experience. And also, I'm a Filipino. That's all! :)

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