Color Me Blue

Chapter 2:

Lately, coffee and toast seemed to be my only comfort food when I began to crave. I've stopped my caffeine habits a year ago but a certain someone got me hung again.

The sound of the toaster broke my reverie and I looked at the clock behind me.

"5:45." I muttered under my breath. I didn't want another tardy slip, so I managed to wake up early.

I went to my bedroom and turned up Spotify. It's amazing how they have specific playlists in accordance to your mood. Thank God for Spotify.

I took a shower and did my makeup afterwards as I moved to Halsey's album Badlands. Halsey wrote songs that either drove you high in one go or drove you low from all those lyrics that loved to beat your heart up.

"Everything was blue, his pills, his hands, his jeans..." Those lyrics reminded me of him. A kind of love that felt ground breaking which turned me into a person I never knew I had the capacity to be. How he turned my life from a normal one to a living tragedy.

Flashback

It was a cold night in Gideon Park as I interlocked my hand with his. The benches felt like huge ice cubes as we both sat on them under the night sky.

He blew smoke on my face as I drank a bottle of Corona. The scent of weed surely was far different from plain tobacco. i loved him and that was the only thing that mattered to me. He was my everything.

Days passed and I thought him and I were inseparable. Yes we had constant fights but we managed to solve it immediatley. Until several days have passed once more and inch by inch I began to feel the distance that grew between us. I cried every night to Daniela my ex bestfriend, and she constantly told me how things were going to be okay.

But weeks after, I found out how he cheated on me with Daniela. From then on, I lost faith in anything genuine that ever came to my life. And that's how you throw away  good memories in one snap.

End of Flashback

Beep! Beep! Beep! My phone was vibrating like crazy. I opened it and found new messages from Bree.

Duuude!!!..
Hey???..
Holy shit wake up alreadyyy!..
Are you skipping class today?..
Where the hell are you?!..

I glanced at the time once more and it was quarter to 8 already. Since I have PE class in an hour, I guess I'll sneak in through the back of the gym.

The bell rang and I managed to get in. Everyone had just changed into their gym sweats and stretched everywhere.

"Alright guys, I only need 10 laps and 20 push ups because I have a meeting to attend to in awhile. In the meantime, I'll have your class president take charge. Miss Ana, please?" Mr. Bennet said firmly. He was one of the young teachers who was close to his students, we can easily relate to him due to the not so distant age he was.

"Go Anaaaa!" We teased her jokingly.

She gave a sarcastic smile and a dirty finger in response. We often teased Ana for the authority she had in class. Ana was an effective class president. But I guess through the course of time, looking back at all the losses that our class had from all the school activities, maybe we had become ineffective students already. The close-knit bond that our class possessed in the early months of school was no longer here anymore.

"Once you're all done, you can all hit the showers and leave for the next class." She announced with stiffness in her voice.

I took this opportunity to mess with my friends and spotted the dodge balls on the far end of the gym. I grabbed two and aimed for Drew and Savannah. Two of the reactions that I was dying to see. As soon as I threw it they came to me fuming with anger and I ran to the other side in laughter. The next thing I knew, the gym had dodge balls thrown all over the place.

The shower felt like cold rain as I took my time washing my hair. Everyone started having their own conversations, usually about hygiene, boys and periods. I then dried myself thoroughly and changed into dry clothes. Somehow these topics weren't as interesting to me anymore as to how they were before.

Everyone was now in their undergarments and thus the teasing had began. "It seems that we all belong to the itty-bitty-titty committee." Someone said casually. We all laughed and started whining in guilt.

As I finished packing my things, I had myself looking for Savannah and it's crazy how it grew as an instinct.

I spotted her all dressed up in a grey hoodie and black jeans with her earphones on. She was heading for the hallway and back to the classroom. She looked pale and flushed as she had her head down on her table. Her long brown curly hair covered most of her face as she did this. She coughed and snorted few times which made me worry a bit.

"She's running a fever and doesn't want to go to the clinic yet." Vince said behind me. Vince was my closest guy friend. Him and I got close just recently from all the gamer babble we shared. He was a good guy who breathed on the existence of anime. Vince also happens to be Savannah's guy best friend.

I approached Savannah and sat on the seat next to her. "You okay? How are you feeling?" I asked, hoping she didn't fret from the concern my voice had.

She rose from her desk. "Yeah I'm alright, just running a slight fever again." She smiled ever so slightly. She did look weak.

"Yeah, your eyes give it off. Its a bit droopy" I said with the tiniest humor.

I continued to finish my homework beside her as tons of thoughts went through my mind. How am I able to make her feel better? I looked at the time and I saw that we still had 7 minutes til break time was over.

Luckily Alexa, another close friend of mine came over and talked to Savannah about a project they had.

"I'll be back. I'll go buy something." I told her excusing myself in the middle of their conversation.

I went downstairs and I headed for the clinic to fetch some aspirin for her fever. I also thought of bottled water since she needed to be hydrated. Fear actually crossed my mind, since I tend to overthink quite often. I thought of the worst possible case, that she may not accept all these. But I disregarded the fear because her health mattered to me the most. She had to be okay, even by the smallest gesture.

Her eyes grew as I handed her the medicine and the bottle. "Oh wow, thanks." She said in awe. "You went all the way to the clinic for this?"

"Yeah, sort of." I said.

"Thanks again!" She drank it immediately and excused herself for the bathroom.

A wave of relief flowed through me and at this very moment, I knew how much at ease I felt when she was. I knew the consequences of what I was doing, what I felt for her was not safe for either both of us. But I held on to the little things that I'm able to do for her, whether or not my feelings would be requited. I have long accepted my defeat and have been looking for a diversion to put my mind off of things.

The bell rang for Math class.