A fun night (a Hetalia fic)

Part 1 of 1

Denmark, Norway, Sweden, and Sealand sat in their living room doing different things all wait for Finland to come back. They planned on having a family dinner that night. Iceland had sadly opped out saying "he would rather be swallowed whole by a kraken and slowly digested than spend more than an hour with Denmark". So the others sat waiting for Finland to return from the store.

Suddenly Sweden's phone rang.

-H'llo
-Y''re wh'r'
-Wh't h'pp'n'd
-'ll b' th'r'

He hung up and abruptly stood up

"D'nm'rk 'nd N'rw'y y' tw' w'tch S''l'nd. 'll b' b'ck."

"DONT WORRY BRO THE KID IS IN GOOD HANDS" Denmark yelled jumping in the air and doing a summersault.

"N'rw'y m'k' s'r' y'' k''p 'n 'y' 'n D'nm'rk" He said before leaving.

A few minutes later Norway's phone rang. "oh really?... i'll be there" he said in his quiet voice. "Denmark I'll be back soon. Don't take your eyes off the kid. And don't do anything to dangerous"

"YEAH SURE WHATEVER BRO THE KID IS SAFE WITH ME"

"Sealand make sure you too don't do anything to dangerous" He said to the child who was focused intently on the television. "Roger that" He said in an energetic voice. After that Norway quietly walked out.

After a few more minutes Denmark's phone rang.

-HEY BRO WHATS UP
-NO WAY NOT WITHOUT ME
-YEAH IM NOT DOING ANYTHING COME PICK ME UP
-ALRIGHT

Sealand looked up at his uncle wondering what had him so excited. "CHANGE OF PLANS IM TAKING YOU SOMEWHERE" He yelled at the child. "Where are we going?" The boy asked ready for an amazing adventure. "OH YOULL LOVE IT"

A car's horn could be heard from outside. "THAT SOUNDS LIKE OUR RIDE LETS GO KID" Denmark said flipping over the couch and waiting for the kid to follow him. Sealand got up and walked toward his uncle. Denmark grabbed his hand and pulled him outside where a large black van was waiting. On the back of it the words "Party Mobile" were written in neon yellow spray paint. Denmark pulled open the door and there was a completely batshit wasted Russia sitting in the drivers seat. "Get in" He said in his deep slightly slurred Russian voice. "NO NEED TO TELL US TWICE" Denmark yelled as he pushed the boy into the back seat and he climbed into the passenger seat.

"I CANT WAIT TO PARRTAAYY" Denmark yelled pumping his fist in the air. "ARE YOU READY FOR THE BEST NIGHT OF YOUR LIFE LITTLE MAN?" He yelled to the backseat where Sealand sat slightly scared and confused. "Um... I guess" He said. He sounded like he was questioning whether what they were about to do was safe and legal. But he put his faith in Denmark and decided whatever they were about to get into was perfectly fine.

"Yeah I am!" He yelled high fiving Denmark. "WHOOP WHOOP THATS THE SPIRIT" Denmark said turning to face the road. "We're almost there." Russia said when the two quieted down. "GREAT" Yelled the Dane.

After two minutes the trio made it to what Sealand thought was an abandoned warehouse. "Uh... Denmark are you sure-"

"TRUST ME YOURE GONNA LOVE THIS" He yelled jumping out of the vehicle. Next came Russia, slightly stumbling in his intoxicated state. The Sealand got out and stood next to his uncle's side. He followed the older men as they walked up to the door. Russia knocked a few times to a specific beat at then the door opened slightly. It opened fully and out stepped a burly man. "What's with the kid?" he asked looking down at Sealand.

"ILL HAVE YOU KNOW IM 12 YEARS OLD!" The kid yelled ready to fight the man. "DONT WORRY HES WITH ME" Denmark said grabbing the boys arm. "Alright whatever. Today you're in for quiet a show."

The man stepped aside and the three entered the warehouse. Sealand was amazed to see something very different than an abandoned warehouse when he steeped in. It was dark but there were strobe lights everywhere. And a spotlight was shown on a pole with a very... drunk man dancing on it.

"NOW THATS NICE!" Russia yelled to the man on the pole. The Brit stopped his gross dancing to face Russia. "Oh sure make fun of the man who dances erotically to support his failing economy will you??!? Do you want to fight me you git!!!" He yelled at the man. He walked closer to the trio stumbling and tripping over people to get to them.

Sealand froze in horror and disgust as he realized he the man is. His face contorted into on of pure horror every step the practically naked man made closer to them. A broken scream/cry thingy left his mouth as he began running away. He ran as fast as his little legs can carry him and he ran and ran and ran until he was no where to be seen.

Russia starred at the clearly drunk man that was standing angrily in front of him. England was wearing nothing more than a black loin cloth covering his willy and a pastel pink tea cup on his head. "LOOKING GOOD THERE ENGLAND" Denmark said winking at the man. "SHUT IT YOU TURD" England yelled back at the man.

Denmark held his hands up in surrender. "NO HARM INTENDED" He said back away a few steps. The Russia was still intently staring at England's hot bod. "DO YOU WANT TO FIGHT BECAUSE ILL FIGHT YOU! GOSH CANT A SINGLE WOMAN SUPPORT HERSELF IN THESE TOUGH TIME??" Then England fell into Russia's arms sobbing. "It is okay" Russia whispered to the grown man crying like a child in his arms. "GOSH I JUST FEEL SO JUDGED NOW A DAYS" England cried louder. Soon everyone could hear the grown mans sobs. "I will make it better for you" Russia said taking the man out of the club.

"WELL I GUESS ITS JUST ME LEFT" Denmark yelled. A little dude in a top hat walked on the stage and yelled, "Now for our main event!" After he walked of the stage the strobe lights stopped flashing and two other spotlights came on. And out walked Finland, Norway, and Sweden in flashy gold aprons which only covered their peen peens. Finland looked as if he was being forced to put on the show, Norway looked bored, and Sweden looked... excited?

"NOW THIS IS WHAT I CALL A MAIN EVENT" DENMARK YELLED. He walked closer to the stage so his brothers could see him proudly supporting them. When he got to the front of the crowd that had gathered around to see Norway's legs, he smiles and waved to them. "D'NM'RK WH'R' 'S MY CH'LD!" Sweden yelled in a mighty roar. "OKAY HE WAS HERE WITH ME BUT SAW ENGLAND AND RAN FAST AWAY" He said shrugging. "YOU BROUGHT HIM TO A STRIP CLUB" Norway yelled. "YEAH I COULDN'T LEAVE HIM HOME ALONE DUH..." He said. "OH ALSO IM LOVING THIS OUTFIT ON YOU, YOU SHOULD WEAR IT MORE OFTEN" He said winking. Sweden jumped off the stage and slapped the Denmark man. "Y'' 'r' ' d'sgr'ac' t' s'c''ty. NOW GO FIND MY CHILD" He roared. "SIR YES SIR" DENMARK YELLED. He ran out of the strip club. He ran passed the party mobile in which Russia and England were passionately doing a kiss while England cried. He ran past a lot of other unimportant stuff until he finally spotted Sealand. He had on the blackest sunglasses everywhere and was sitting in the middle of a circle of squirrels. "SELAND WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" Denmark yelled. "It's too late to save my innocence after I saw /that/. I joined a squirrel gang and was promoted to their leader. And you're on their hit list. Say goodnight uncle Denny." Sealand stood up and pointed a gun at Denmark. "If this is the end make sure Norway knows I love his legs."

And then Sealand shot