Stolen Love

10*

Days go by, and Chris and I barely say a word to each other. If he wants an apology, he isn't going to get one. I'm too stubborn and too prideful to do something as ridiculous as that.

I've been spending a lot of time alone in the room. Scratch that, I spend all my time locked in the room. I eat here, sleep here, and bore myself to death in here. My meals come far from each other and don't really hold much, but I can live on it.

He isn't going to break me.

Maybe he is doing what my Mom used to do to punish me. Send me in my room to 'think about what I did'. Of course back then, I would be able to play on my phone or sleep but you get my point. He is just trying to force me into doing what he wants.

But I will admit, this is unlike Chris. Before our fight, he couldn't stand to be away from me for two hours, but now he's leaving me alone all day. There's something more than just this going on with him. Maybe I've worn him out, and he needs some time to think, too.

The only time I see him is when he brings my food up here and at night. He still sleeps in here, but his arm doesn't wrap around me when I sleep. He doesn't even look at me half the time, and when he does, his face fills with sadness and longing.

It pains me to admit this, but I do kind of miss him at some times. I felt alone when it was just me and him, but now it's gotten to the point where it is unbearable. Having close to no human contact can do a number on the mind. I'm starting to crave attention from anyone, even something as simple as a smile. I used to think that Chris leaving me alone would be the best thing to ever happen to me, and it was at first, but now I'm feeling myself going crazy. He can't keep me locked in here all alone like some sort of animal.

To make things worse, I can't even watch Ryan or my family on tv anymore either. The news moved on from my disappearance. Now they talk about football and stupid things like dog shows. It really kind of disappointing to be replaced by some pampered, prissy Pomeranian puppy that has bows all over it.

It's almost as if they have given up on me. I try not to let this upset me, though. But who am I kidding? It's the worst feeling in the world to have been given up on.

And now the loneliness I'm experiencing is eating me from the inside out. I never knew how lonely I could be until I went two weeks without having a real conversation with anyone. It has really made me think. Talking to Chris, or even Danny, would be better than slowly going crazy. I'm still not desperate enough to talk to Jonathan, but soon I fear I will be there.

As much as I want to hate Chris, I can't. Other than taking me, he hasn't done anything wrong. Everything he has done has been influenced by Jonathan. He hasn't really hurt me. He hasn't really forced me to do much. Compared to other stories I've heard about what captors have done to their victims, I guess I have gotten somewhat lucky. Life for me could easily be much worse than what it is.

I just need to make sure I don't make things worse for myself by ticking Chris off too bad.

So I lied: I will apologize to Chris, not because I want to, but because I have to. I just can't take the silence and punishment of being left with only myself any longer.

It's about lunch time so Chris will be here any minute. My stomach has knots in it. What if he wants a reason for why I'm sorry all of a sudden? I don't know what I would say. This is dumb. I shouldn't even apologize to him in the first place. Wouldn't I just be falling in to his trap?

The door opens and Chris walks in. His face is grim. I haven't seen a smile from him in forever in what feels like an eternity. Maybe when he smiles again, I'll have a reason to as well.