The Note (completed)

Tough Love

Twelve
{Daytona's Point Of View}

I keep quiet as Jordaine reads the note. I know that if I try to do anything to make her not read it, it wouldn't work. Jordaine would do something like sit on top of me and read it. Why didn't I just rip it up when I had the chance?

Jordaine looks up at me after reading it, she almost looks angry, but the anguish is clearly shown in her eyes.

I don't want her to be disappointed or mad at me again. She was the one that gave me this idea for writing up notes then ripping them up instead of self harming or using drugs like I use to.

"Day Day..." She growls under her breath as she crumbles the paper in her hand. "I don't even know what to say..."

"Just say what's on your mind!" I snap before reaching for my shirt on the floor, putting it on.

"I shouldn't have said that..." Jordaine whispers shaking her head, and she puts on her shirt as well. "Just pretend that I didn't say anything, alright? Act like I never said those three words. You just want me to be yo sis, so you got it!" Jordaine scoffs and walks out of my room before I could say anything else to her.

I sit there, in complete shock. That deteriorated rather quickly. She said she doesn't love me anymore...

"Day Day! Dinner time!" Mom calls out from the kitchen table downstairs.

I get up, but regret it immediately. I feel like I'm carrying dead weight, and I can't move. I don't want to be near Jordaine at this moment. I don't want to look at her or speak to her. I feel like I would die if I did, or just break down.

I make it out of my room decently and walk to the kitchen. Jordaine, mom, and dad are sitting at their usual seats at the table, leaving one space for me. I notice Jordaine glance at me, but then looking away instantly.

I feel sick...

I sit at the table, poking at my food, while Jordaine eats, and mom and dad are having their usual conversation about work, laughing joyfully.

I clear my throat and everybody turns their attention to me. "I have something I would like to ask."

"What is it, baby?" Mom asks and smiles.

"Well, ma I wanna know." I can't think of the right choice of words to use in this question. Maybe I should just blurt it out, I'm good at doing that. "You accept me?"

They all drop their sliver ware making a clinking noises. Jordaine is looking down at her lap, frowning.

Mom and dad look at me sympathetically. Silence...

I don't want this as an answer. I need someone to speak up, not leaving me hanging on the edge by my finger nails as always.

"Well?! Tell me! Stop fuckin' ignoring me, and answer the damn question for once!" I snap as my mom furrows her eyebrows.

"Jordaine-" She starts.

"Nah, fuck all dhat! Answer the question! You always shut me out, and I'm fucking done!" I shout now getting up from my seat.

"We were waiting to tell you. But, we got this great doctor back when we were in Hawaii." Mom sighs and tries to pull on a smile.

"She's delivered the sin out of a young boy that use to live in our neighborhood. So, I know she can cure you, baby girl." Jordaine's dad nods and starts finishing his dinner.

This is my worst nightmare.

It explains why Jordaine and I have been treated differently; she would get more attention than me, since mom and her dad found out about me liking girls.