He cleared his throat again before speaking. “Maybe we should get going,”
“What, can’t wait to get rid of me?” I joked, and just like that, all the nervous energy dissipated. He grinned and opened the door for me, sweeping his arm out.
“After you madam,” He said, his British accent more pronounced.
“Why thank you,” I said in my best British accent, curtsying and he followed me out.
We turned to go our separate ways but my hand shot out to grab his arm. I gulped. Oh no. It’s dark. Too dark. Crap.
“Do you think you can walk me home?” I said, embarrassed, but it came out more like a squeak.
“Oh, afraid of the dark are we?” His expression softened and said, “Come on,”
I followed beside him, still clinging on to his arm for dear life. Okay, I’ll admit it. Even if I am a teeny bit scared of the dark, I wanted him there. I managed to relax after I arrived home onto the safe BRIGHT porch.
“Thanks for walking me home. It was very…sweet of you,” I admitted.
“Oh come on, it was nothing. It’s okay,” He said pleasantly.
“No really, I appreciate it a lot,” I smiled up at him and squeezed his hand that I was still holding. A few golden strands of his now brown hair (he took my advice and grew it out) glinted under the warm porch light. “Bye, Nancy,” I grinned, using the nickname he hated, just to mess with him.
But instead of the whining or complaining I was expecting, there was that weird expression again. I just wanted to reach out and smooth the lines between his eyebrows with my fingers.
“Goodbye Fae, I’ll miss you,” He said wistfully, with a wisp of a smile on his face. I laughed. “Don’t act like you’re never going to see me again,” I paused. “Bye Drew, I’ll miss you too,” I added as an afterthought. I smiled and before I could chicken out, I stood on my tiptoes and kissed him on the cheek. A shot of warmth darted through me, from both the adrenaline and the affection I felt for him. He looked stunned.
I chuckled, because I made him speechless. That thought alone made me want to jump and sing, for some absurd reason. I shot him one last grin before stepping through the doorway and said, “See you tomorrow,”
He smiled wistfully and turned away. As he did so I heard him mutter something like, “I wish,” I shook my head. Nah couldn’t be. Could it?
I watched him walk all the way down the driveway and along the road until he disappeared from sight, his outline illuminated by the moonlight and the street lamps. I closed the door and melted into a puddle of Fae on the floor, I literally felt like I could die happy. And I didn’t even know why.
The next day was Saturday, I had the morning shift, along with Isaac, Crystal, Keri and Drew. As soon as I stepped foot through the door I knew something was wrong. Isaac and Crystal were already there, looking like someone died. The thing missing was energy. The bright, friendly energy Drew always exudes. My gut tensed. I knew the past few days were too good to be true.
“What’s going on?” I asked Crystal, even though somehow, I already knew. She shook her head and pointed to the counter where a bouquet of blood red roses rested. I hurried over. Please don’t let it be something utterly horrible. I can’t even think about it.
Next to the bouquet was a small envelope.
Fae Woods
I opened it, and it said:
Hey Fae, when you read this, you probably just got in. I don’t really know how to say this, so I’m just gonna say it. My dad got transferred back to London. I’m pretty sure you know what that means. I’m so so SO sorry I didn’t tell you earlier. I just didn’t know how to say it, and I figured the goodbye would be less painful. But it’s not. I mean, if you actually miss me like I miss you.
Oh hell, I’m just gonna come out and say it. Or in this case write it. You are seriously one of the most amazing girls I have ever met. You’re sweet, pretty, sarcastic, easily annoyed but quick to forgive. Most of all you put up with me, right? So that must be worth something. I could go on but my pen’s running out of ink. Right now I can picture you laughing, but the question is, are you sad? Do you miss me?
‘Cause I really miss you. And I just think you should know: I like you. In more than a friend way. I feel so bad about burdening you with this info but I feel like you have to know. But you and I both know it’s not going to work out. It’s just that I’m here, and you’re there…Long distance relationships are just…no.
I want to move on and I hope you do too. So smile that cute little smile of yours, life is too short to dwell on sadness (just something I thought you’d say).
Goodbye Fae.
Love, Drew
The letter ended. The ink was running because of the few teardrops that dropped onto it but I had already read all I needed to read. I can’t believe it. He left, just like that. A part of me wanted to be mad at him, to blame him, just to have someone to be mad at. But I knew I could never stay mad at him. The longest I’ve stayed angry at him was like less than a day.
I got permission from Isaac to call off work. They can manage without me. He let me go with sad eyes; he knew how close we were. Even though he could be irritating, he was well liked by all the employees. Especially me, definitely in more than a friend way.
I walked home alone, this time with no Drew and in broad daylight, but it felt colder. When I got home and passed the hallway mirror, I noticed my red nose and messy hair. I made myself a cup of tea and went up to my room.
Why him? Why does it have to be the guy who moves thousands of miles away? Why couldn’t he have been someone who goes to my school, or at least lives in this town?
Because then he wouldn’t be Drew. This is probably fate’s way of warning us not to be together. Damn you fate. I missed his corny jokes, his easy smile, his teasing smirk. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t shake the mental image of him in London, meeting a British girl.
What if she’s nice?! It would be impossible for me to hate her then. Nah, I don’t think I have it in me to hate anyone anyway. What if he forgets me? Argh, I’m being silly. So what? It’s not like the world will end. Then why do I feel like my insides are tearing up?
I have other friends, sure. But he’s just so uniquely Drew. There’s Facebook chat, texting, Skype and phone calls, but it won’t be the same. I will move on someday. I have too. It’s stupid to pine after a guy I’ll never have. We’ll meet again someday, but as friends.
And it still hurts to think about what could have been.
