Restless

What Happens After

_  I was so busy reminding myself to survive, that I forgot how to live.....

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The strangest thing in Pembroke Hills Police Department was that there wasn't many chairs or benches. This was so that the people believed not a lot of crime happened in the town, and Lucas being one of the juveniles knew that was a lie.  That and the fact there was a cactus, from all the plants out there Lucas couldn't believe that his father chose a cactus to decorate the Department. 

Considering that it was very late there wasn't a lot of people in the station, just his father and some other officers. So due to the lack of people there wasn't much Lucas could do to distract himself, so he had to count the antagonizing seconds as he waited for his father to finish his phone call. 

It took a lot to convince his father that he wasn't joking when he called and told him he burned a church, which by then although it wasn't fully burning on the outside the inside was raging. The rest was all a blur to Lucas but he did remember hearing the fire truck sirens, and his father ushering him away with the police car. He didn't bother telling his father that it was an accident  or even properly explain to him how he burned the church, but he knew that he had to explain at some point, just not now.  His father had to inform the other officers who called the firemen, Lucas guessed that at some point someone must've called the priest. 

"You can come in now." Lucas was dreading those words ,because although he hated sitting outside his father's office with nothing to do and the remaining officers glaring at him, he didn't want to hear a lecture, he knew what he did was wrong but with the whiskey still in his system -he doubted it  will leave- he had a huge headache and he was pretty sure he couldn't form sentences without slurring .  He got up from the seat and slowly entered his father's office bracing himself for his father's wrath. 

"I suppose you have a good reason, someone made you do it, you fell asleep and magically woke up to the church burning and you didn't know how it happened", his father stopped to put his hands through his thining brown hair before continuing, " you were driving by and saw the church on fire so like the good citizen that you are you stopped and called the police." His father continued and Lucas was sure he could detect a faint sarcastic tone. 

They both stared at each other, they were engaging in a staring contest. It was to see who was gonna back down first, to see if Lucas would come clean at that moment, on the rare occasions that Lucas did look down his punishment wasn't as harsh as when he didn't . But tonight, maybe it was the alcohol floating in his system or maybe it was the simply fact that Lucas was very defiant, a trait he ironically inherited from his father. 

"Look son, this isn't something that I can ignore from writing it down  - like the alcohol I'm smelling on you-   it's something that involves the whole town! So you can start apologizing and create some lie about how it was an accident and you didn't mean it and we can talk about it at home, or you can spend your night in a cell and we can take this whole thing to court, I could read you your rights right now."

It wouldn't be the first time Lucas spent a night in  a cell, but it would be the first time he did something truly illegal. It wasn't until tonight that he found out that burning a church had a name other than 'church burning'. His father told him when he was arrested earlier. 

" Do you have any idea what you've just done!  This is  church arson there's actually a whole section for this, and  I won't be able to save your ass  out of this one!  law number  105 Pub.L. 104-155 and it's very serious!  Get that lazy look  of your face.... God,  you've been drinking!  "  At this point some officers had arrived so his father had to lower his voice so they wouldn't hear " why ? why today, hmm? 

"Is it because of  your mother, do you think she'll be proud of you just because she was an atheist ?" 

 The last one had really stuck to Lucas because he wasn't really thinking of his mother, so having his father mention her out of the blue really struck him hard. His mother died on this day, he was supposed to be grieving her and instead he got drunk and burned down a church. He decided that despite the headache the whiskey caused and despite the anger he felt for Ryder ad for himself he will explain to his father what happened and why he snuck out on  school night, he didn't have to explain to his father about the drinking and he left out all the details about Ryder and Amanda and how he caught them in one of the many bathrooms of Jack McCormick's house. He blamed what happened in the church on his stupidity and how he wasn't thinking straight and how he wasn't feeling well, he didn't say why he wasn't feeling well but he knew his father would think it was because of his mother and a part of him felt guilty for using his mother as a pawn, but maybe she did have something to do with it because he did feel the sting every time he taught of her, the sting that faded with each gulp of beer. Even now, sitting in a police station in front of his father he felt the need to at least take a gulp, he could practically feel the  ice-cold, bittersweet taste sliding down his throat.

When he was done his father was staring at him in awe, but it wasn't the type that was amazed or anything it was as if he was...disappointed ?  As if to say  that's it ? That's how you burned down a church, it was that recklessly  simple?

"You burned down a church because you stupidly spilled whiskey-we'll talk about that later by the way- and then dropped a match? "

Lucas didn't bother answering and just shook his head yes. His father still had that look on his face and they started  staring at each other  again, but this time Lucas looked away, he didn't want to make his situation worse. 

" O.K, So this is what's going to happen, tonight you're staying in the cell for under age drinking-no I'm not bailing you out, than we'll see what happens. I think I could get you out of this one with community service and pay for the damages you caused." Lucas again, didn't say anything he was so  exhausted that he  was willing to sleep in a cell to stop the interrogation. He knew he should be more grateful to his father, not many parents were this simpetic  with their kids, but at that moment he felt like he couldn't be bothered with life.  He knew he brought it on himself but still he felt like he needed to blame someone, otherwise he would feel even more pathetic. But his father was grieving as well.

"Thanks, dad." he said finally when he was sure his dad was done speaking. He felt like his dad deserved more than him, after all, all he did was bring a bunch of chaos that his dad had to fix.

"Don't be, it's coming out of your allowance."

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O.K GUYS I'M BACK FROM HIDING!!!

LOL, SORRY FOR THE WAIT THOUGH.