roommates » jack gilinsky (#wattys2016)

fourteen

sam left us after jack practically begged him to. he probably thought he was going to get some, but he was so wrong. we're literally sitting on the couch, admiring each other's company.

"what would you call us?" i ask jack, combing through his hair softly with my fingers.

a random television show quietly plays in the background, just as some extra noise so the room isn't dead silent. it's never dead silent because jack really knows how to keep a conversation going.

he narrows his eyes at me in confusion, "um... roommates?"

"no," i laugh. "us." i repeat, being sure to emphasize.

he clears his throat, clearly becoming uncomfortable. he sits up, making my eyebrows pull together. what the hell is wrong with him? him sitting up all the way, makes me move a little away from him.

"i mean, we're just messing around and having fun right?" he questions as a reply.

messing around? having fun?

i scoff, "right."

because i wasted one month of my life and got rid of an amazing boy just to 'mess around'. not knowing what to say or how to deal with this situation, i stand up from the couch and jack's eyes don't leave me.

"where are you going?" he asks me.

"i'm going to shower before cara comes to study." i tell him, making something up right on the spot.

he frowns, "you okay?"

"yes." i mutter.

no.

i try my best and fight the urge to stomp childishly into my room. why was i so stupid to ask that question? combing my fingers through my hair in frustration, i use my free hand to shut the door behind me and lock it.

those words keep running around my mind. the last thing i wanted to be again is one that someone uses to mess around with. i can't believe i let myself be so vulnerable and idiotic.

jack is really sweet, but maybe that's masking that he just wants sex from me. now, i'm assuming way too much and i need to stop. shaking off the thought, i stay true to my words and head into my bathroom for a long, hot shower.

you would think that by now, you'd want to be tied down and stop playing around unless you were a frat boy. which jack is not, but he's probably considered it once or twice in his life.

i just need to get jack out of my mind for a moment and enjoy this shower that i'm about to take. i told myself not to ever worry about boys until college was over. i have more important things to worry about.

like my dad. whom i need to visit within the next week. even though he doesn't remember who i am, i still like being there for him. so many things are clouding my mind right now. a headache is going to form.

jack's pov (surprise)

after nova left into her room, she locked the door, making me grow even more puzzled. she never locks her door unless something is wrong. what did i even say that was so bad?