Hi guys, so here is part 6:)))) part 7 is the original OS FIVE ONE SHOT. Then I'll make a part 8 which is after the original one shot everyone wanted a part 2 too. If your confused about anything please your welcome to message me anytime! Enjoy! Xxx
The difference between me and other girls are... They want to just have him. I want to fix him, show him more to life. I want to love him. Why can't he see that, I'm dying! There is a big difference between 'loving you' and 'I'm in love with you' and I'm in love with him. I was so scared to love, I always cut the feelings out when I sleep with someone, but with Jacob no matter how hard I tried to stop feelings for him i couldn't. That shows my feelings are real! I'd do anything for him! I'm sick of being a 'fuck' to him because that all he sees of me, yes I'm his baby mother but that makes no difference.
Lord please save him for me, just do this one favour for me!
26/2/16
I sat up all night, waiting for Jacob to return from the ED. I had a lot of time to think about what I want. Yes I want Jacob in my life, to hold be every night and to be called his girlfriend not his baby mom. But then Jacob is bad for me, not psychically but mentally he is no good for me. He messes with my head but not on purpose. Half of the time I don't think he knows his doing it. When he fucks me and holds me like he loves me - then runs to his Sasha that is messes with me. I cry everyday because I'm in love with him, his girlfriend can't love him the way I do! We have a family, we have a beautiful baby girl together the love of my life. What more could he ask for! I can't say I'm not hurt I'm broken, what we had was different, but she can have it! I'd give up all I have for him and daughter! Anything and everything!
I can't stay here, I've had enough of no love.
I've thought of it, creeping; that's so stupid creeping! I'm a grown woman for gods sake. Jacob and I aren't going out so why am I like this. See! This is why he is no good for me! He has me thinking I'm cheating if I see another man!
I can't stay here, I've had enough of no love.
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Jacob walked through my front door at 12:00am in his work clothes. I didn't have work today as Wednesday's were my days off to spend with Ria-May.
I was scared I was going to fall for his charm again! And flawless. I'm so in love with him it hurts for me to say I want to let him go. But it's for best, for me and Ria-May.
You've pushed me far...you brought me to this. You had my heart...but then you blew it, and, I'm so over you.
Or am I?
"Talk to me Con?" Jacob said holding my legs up to sit down, he put my legs on his lap, rubbing my thighs.
My eyes were saw from crying none stop when Jacob left. "I'm tired Jacob. I'm tired of being your side piece." I said tilting my head to the side.
Jacob looked hurt, just as much as me. I couldn't stand to see him like that.
Connie looked hurt, just as much as me. I couldn't stand to see her like that.
"See, why can't you speak! I'm done Jacob with all this!" Connie didn't shout or scream but simply said it calmly. "You can see Ria whenever you like, but there is no more me and you, this!" Connie said trying to get up from the sofa.
"Connie get here!" Jacob jumped to his feet pulling Connie by her arm. "I love you, you know that your the only woman for me! I'll change me ways! You can't leave me" Jacob said looking deep into Connie's eyes not once both of them looked away.
"But how long for Jacob. A week or two? I can't keep doing this. When will my life start! I can't date or do anything I'm tired of waiting for you to change like you say! I love you so much it hurts I cry myself to sleep every night because I know you won't change but I tell myself you will. Please don't promise me anything, your bad for me. I can't keep myself away from you. But you mess my head up too much and I've let you do it to many times.
A single tear dropped to Jacobs cheek. He pressed his lips to Connie's throwing his tongue down her throat. Connie didn't pull away but fell into his body. Jacob grabbed her bum pulling her in more and more. A tear rolled down Connie's face but a small smile across her face.
"I love you. I'm in love with you!"