How To Make Him Jealous

Chapter 16

To be honest, I feel like a screw up. Like one big fat, massive, huge, fuck up. And it hurts.

So bad.

Because now I'm stuck.

With no one to help me but my own pathetic self.

Because I've lost everyone else.

No one will help a fuck up.

And that my friends, is a life lesson I will never forget.

It's been two weeks since the Dylan incident and a hell of a lot more incidents have happened.

Now I'm stuck with something I don't need.

Something I don't want

Someone that is also a big fat, massive, huge mistake.

And it's not going anytime soon.

It all started when I got the plane home from that party......

•>•>•<•<•<•<•<•<•<•<•<•<•<•<•<•<•<•<•<•>

I'm in a taxi. Back in Sydney. In the same city as Chris. Probably Liam as well.

I got away from Dylan's friends place as quick as I could, it was such an awkward morning. I couldn't look him in eye, let alone stay 5 more minutes in that place.

''That will be 7 dollars and 13 cent,''

I pull out a 10 dollar note and thrust it in the drivers hand.

''Keep the change."

Chris booked me a hotel. I had to lie and tell him that it was a family dilemma and that I needed to be alone.

I'm getting too good at lying, aren't I ?

I'm not even sure about what's happening anymore. It's all confusing . It's just happened and I just want to take it back so bad. Everything.

And I mean everything.

I want to go back to Malibu and wait for Liam to come home instead of going out to get him, .

I want to not know.

I want to go back to how it was. When everything was simple. When I wasn't sleeping with my ex-boyfriends brother and kissing them like some desperate whore. When I wasn't crying and screaming inside to break out from this fucking nightmare. When I wasn't worried that I had just slept with someone, my best friend, with no protection and no pill.

It just got worse.

I'm on my period.

And Annabel won't pick up the fucking phone.

I feel like a screw up. I know I can't take what I did back. I know that this isn't a nightmare but is in fact reality. I know that what I did would never get Liam back.

Isn't this what I wanted all along ? To get Liam back ?

Well it hasn't worked and now, I'm back to step one. A crying mess, standing on the street near a hobo wondering what the fuck just happened. Wondering what the actual hell do I do next ?