How To Make Him Jealous

Chapter 19

Faith

A tip the driver ahead of time, telling him to go faster.

I have a crazed, physocopathic look in my eyes and I know it.

It's also full of sass and bad -ass girl power.

Wow ! I'd got through them fast. Two out of three already and I wasn't stopping. I'd started this mess and I wasn't not finishing it when it had already caused so much mental damage that I wasn't even aware of.

And so I let the driver drive even faster.

About fifteen traffic light stops later, we pull off the main road and rattle along the backroad towards the glass box house thing.

The taxi driver was shifting uncomfortable in his seat obviously disturbed by my desperation to get to my destination.

I knew what I was going to do. I felt like I had to do it.

I could feel my phone vibrating on my leg, the mental urge to ignore it is strong but I was feeling some what weak.

Groaning with defeat, I pick it up to see over fifty missed calls from three different people.

Grumbling something under my breath, I decline the call and take a breath.

I let the hot air of Australia envelop me and enter my lungs.  I was attempting to clear my head but it failed.

It just made me feel confused about what path I wanted to take.

My phone starts buzzing again, a quick glance confirms a different caller. 

Fuck. I don't need this.

I tilt my head back, attempting, again, to clear my head again . I was worried about hyperventilating. It was was of my nervous breakdown / mental breakdown symptoms.

I groan. Telling the driver to pull over. He glances back, looking me up and down.

I probably scream just-slept-with-someone / slut-as-fuck. Why ? Because I have sex hair, stink of sweat, breathing heavily, leg jiggling, obviously haven't changed clothes since last Monday and keep licking my lips.

And shit.

It sucks.

The driver pulls over and I pay him his money. I've stopped about 400 metres away from my destination and just staring at it from a distance makes my palms sweat.

My phones about to stop ringing so taking a few deep breaths, I answer it.

"Hazel ?" I breath.

"Faith !" A clear British accent rings out.

It feels good to hear a familiar voice but it just feels like a punch to the gut. A million punches to the gut.

"Honey ? How are you ?" Hazel continues.

Another punch.

"I'm...fine." I sigh, rubbing my head with too much force.

"I know that sigh too well." Hazel retorts, down the phone.

Me and Hazel were pen pals at first. My Australian village was twinned with her British one and we'd written letters to each other since the age of 6 and had met up many times when we were traveling to one another country's in the early years of our lives. Our friendship had bloomed when we both went 'to the place of dreams'. Hazel went for work. I went  for Liam. My experience of LA was spent with Hazel since the age of 18 and when I'm not on the phone to Annabel, me and Hazel are in Starbucks, gossiping and catching up like we did when we were seven , just through letters not caramel lattes.

"It's been a long day." I groan, sitting down on the verge.

"Spill." Hazel says bluntly.

I groan again.

"Liam or the other two ? Annabel said you were having a rough time at the moment ?" Hazel retorts, not giving in.

"All three." I whimper.

Another punch.

"Carry on." Hazel pushes.

"What did Annabel tell you ?" I say, bracing myself for a painful conversation.

"Only that now wasn't a good time for you to visit me and that you needed some time alone." Hazel sighs impatiently.

"Well...it's a long story." I respond, attempting to end the conversation cleanly.

"I have all day ." Hazel wasn't one to give in.

"Liam cheated on me....that's how it started." I blurt, folding my arm under my legs.

"Oh Faith, I'm so--" Hazel starts.

"No ! I don't want your sympathy, or pity because there's more...a lot more." I snap harshly.

No one talks for a second.

"I got angry and jealous and every bad emotion just combined into one." I prepare myself for the conversation that is going to follow that sentence.

" Chris invited me to stay with him and Dylan for a while and I agreed. Liam and me...we've been dating so long and to see him with someone else I wanted him back so badly and so I just started trying to seduce Chris and it worked. Hazel me and Chris kissed and then made out a day later. Liam saw me with my tongue down his brothers throat ! My  Chris ! The one I grew up with ! The one who made a drunken promise to marry me if we were both single by forty....." I don't stop.

"Then we were in town...me and Dylan...and I kissed him in front of Liam and it felt good to see Liam's pain, so when Dylan invited me to this party in Melbourne ...I accepted. God ! It all just started going down hill. I slept with Dylan with no protection...I was drunk. Hazel it felt so awful. Dylan looked so hurt. I wasn't thinking straight and so I came back to Sydney. God ! I'm not even thinking straight now ! " I take another deep breath of Australian air.

"Then Liam found me and it just felt good to see him and not be making out or shagging his brothers. And so we slept together. I still can't get my head round it. " I start to breath heavily ."
Hazel I'm on my way to Chris ! And guess what ? I'm probably gonna sleep with him as well !" I take a deep breath.

Another punch.

"It's so fucked up." I whisper down the phone.

There's another painful silence.

"Your kidding ?" Hazel snorts.

"Unfortunately no, I'm very serious."

"Wow ! Your in deep shit Faith !" Hazel laughs.
"Theres about a million things you've got to worry about now."

I know she still wasn't believing me.

"God ! I'd laugh if your pregnant !" Hazel jokes.

My gut explodes.