The Fight (Stefonnie)

Chapter 4

Bonnie's POV

The way he looks at me, all that I see is love and I want him to act on it, I want us both to act on it, but then I see that gold band on his left ring finger and I think to myself that he's already married. I know that I've slept with guys before that are married, but this is different. He wasn't with a wife that gave nothing to him, or treated him like a bank and nothing else, his wife was dead and gone and he didn't even get the chance to say goodbye.

It was a tragic story and he's opened up to me more about Amber and I must admit that they sounded like the perfect couple and I know that no couple is perfect, but they were damn sure close to it.

They knew almost everything there is to know about each other—if not everything there is to know about each other—and the way Stefan talks about her is like he's still so madly and deeply in love with her that it breaks my heart.

I catch myself getting angry at God for ever taking Amber away from him because the man was the best husband he could ever be to her and He had to go and take her away, away from a man who didn't deserve the littlest of bad things to happen to him.

I find myself asking WHY and then I remember myself. If Amber was still around, I'm sure that Stefan still would've given me Brian's number (and I now remember that I still have to give him a ring), but I'm not sure if he would care so much about me afterwards.

If we ran into each other, I'm sure he would speak to me and ask me how I was doing, but never on a level like this. Him letting me stay at his place, him protecting me, taking me out on dates (or whatever he wants to call it), I don't think that Amber would have approved.

Maybe such a tragedy happened so that I can be a better person, or at least try to be a better person and now coming to that realization, I realize that I need to try harder. Stefan deserves it, Amber deserves it, I owe it to them to try harder, to be a better person and I owe it to myself as well.

Mutual POV

Stefan looks up watching the stars fill the night's sky as they walked along the sidewalk. Mystic Falls was pretty much empty at night and it felt like everyone had gone off on vacation leaving only the two of them there. He looked for the brightest one and closed his eyes for a few.

Wishing on stars was something that he always used to do and even back then he knew that it was just a "game" that what you wish doesn't actually come true, but he still did it anyway. He didn't have a wish in mind now, but it just felt good to go back in time a little.

Bonnie watches him then smiles turning her eyes away before he opens them and catches her staring. She hears him let out a breath.

"I always find myself wondering when I grew up." He starts lowly like he's talking to himself. "Time goes by so fast, it's like one day and I woke up already with a profession and it's just been that way ever since."

"I don't believe that we really grow up." Bonnie confessed. "We age every day and by that we grow and maybe experience new things, maybe meet new people, but the one thing that is definite is that we grow. We don't stop until we're dead and then we're just... fairy dust."

"Very interesting." He processed her words.

"I used to wish on stars every day and it was all the same wish. I wanted someone to adopt me, I wanted someone to love me, but they never came. Every day I'd close my eyes and wish with so much hope and faith, but it ended up pointless, I guess." She softly chuckles and he looks down at her. "I used to starve myself, thinking that maybe I was too fat. I woke up once on the floor and realized that I had fainted and no one cared enough to know that I was missing to come look for me. I was invisible and when the starving didn't work, I used to cut. The enjoyment of the pain I caused upon myself was the only emotion that I felt for the longest of time."