Shawny

Chapter 2

"Dude, you in here?" 

"I'm busy Chaz!" I screamed out the door. He walked in anyway.

"Man, what are you doing?" he was laughing at me.

As a child, I always had a fascination with detective work. So naturally my parents bought me every spy, detective, and cop kit there was on the market. And naturally they will make the appearance in my real life detective work. 

Chaz was laughing cause i had out a fingerprint finder kit. One of those cheap things you think will never work but it's fun to pretend anyways. But this kit, this kit was my favourite, and the only reason? It worked. I was able to accuratly figure out some of the toughest childhood crimes. Who took the last cookie in the jar? My dad's finger print came up fresh and clear. Who pranked me by destroying my room? Chaz's fingerprints were the last on my door knob.

Now I know that sounds crazy, you know, Chaz just coming into my house, but he has had a key to the side door since he was 8. Our familes were just so close that we could come and go from each others homes, even if no one was there. Chaz was always my brother, and his house was always a home away from home. The two of us used to discuss it like little girls. We would say things like "I feel bad for those who don't have a friendship like ours" and "Best friends for ever and ever!". But now. Now we are older, and the brother thing has taken a whole new side. Now I end up playing the younger, less powerful kid, where Chaz always bugs me and controls me. Don't get me wrong, it's not bad, but he just likes to laugh at me a lot. Hense where we are now. He's laughing at me because he doesn't understand. Truthfully, I don't expect him to!

"Dude, it isn't funny. I'm being serious here!"

"Nah man, it's pretty funny"

"Who let you in here anyway" I gave him a glare and we both started to laugh. Then I stopped right away. No matter how hard i tried, the laughs and smiles just didn't feel right. I didn't feel like i should be happy while Shawny's family suffers, and deep down i know I am hurting too. 

"Listen dude," Chaz began. "I know it's tough. But you have to keep in mind how young you are. Shawny never even looked at you, so how was she worth it? She didn't love you like you loved her. And i know it hurts now, but you have to keep an open mind. The pain will die down. Don;t let it get to you, and ruin the rest of your life."

By this point I'm furious. I stand up, shooting my chair back at him, nearly knocking him off his feet. Chaz looks at me, and I can see the fear in his eyes as he stares back at me. I have never done anything like this before. My eyes act like daggers on his, and Chaz just looks away.

"Get. Out." I say between clenched teeth. My hands are clenched into fists as I fight back the urge to swing.

'Dude... c-comon." Chaz stammers.

'GET OUT!" I am screaming with tears rolling down my face. I charge at Chaz. His body slams into the wall behind him leaving a dent. Chaz cries out but I ingnore him. I hear a slight crack, but I ignore it. My adrenaline is pumping so fast I don't listen to a singing work, noise, or crie Chaz lets out. I'm swinging with all my might, uncontrolably crying and scream.

"CLARK!" I hear him scream out in pain. But he doens't dare throw a punch back at me. He sits there and takes it all. Though I don't think I am actually hitting him. Even though I feel like he deserves every hit the skull I can possibly give him. 

Every punch I throw, Chaz dodges. Until i finally stand back, look down at him lying on the floor, and realize his head is bleeding. 

'No...'  I think to myself. 

I realized he hadnt dodged a single punch. My fists are numb. I stare at Chaz, stare down at my hands, back at Chaz, and ran out the door. Chaz is still on my bedroom floor, unable to get up, bleeding. Probably has a fracture in his spine, explaining the crack I heard when i threw him into the wall. My carpet is going to be stained forever, and I will have to live in that room , always remember this day. But I know i can't just go back and help him after all that. Instead, I call up my mom. She says she will be home in a few minutes. So i tell her that I'm not home, but she can put my laundry on my bed. Now she will find Chaz, and I will just have to suffer the consiquences later.

Why would Chaz say something like that? I mean, I know he didn't like Shawny, even a little bit, but why attack her after she's already gone? Maybe Chaz isn't the guy I have always thought he was. No, I'm being delusional. He is, and always will be my best friend. I just hope that after today's inncedent he forvgives me. 

Since I have no where to run, I am sitting in the bushes across from my house. I watch as firetrucks, ambulances', and police cars show up. I watch the paramedics carry Chaz out on a stretcher. Once again I look down at my fists. What had I done? I keep saying to myself over and over again. Suprise was still upon my face, and would be for a very long time. My brain doensn't even remember what had happened up in my room. I remember a crash, a cry, a scream, and blood. Lots of blood. Next thing i know, I'm out on the road. No where to run, no where to hide. 

Ring Ring! 

My heart skips a beat. I look down at my screen, and the dreaded name pops up in bold lettering, burning my eyes.

'Mom"

I take a deep breath in, and let it all the way out before i answer. I'm facing the consequences far sooner than I had anticipated, but I guess if i send my mom up to my room while our neighbor is bleeding from his skull on my floor then I have to expect immediate confrontation. 

'He-e-hello...?" My voice is as shakey as ever.

"Clark. You get home right away and explain this!" I can hear that she is crying.

My hands tremble and i drop my phone. What have I done? What have I done? is all that is running through my mind. I have turned into a monster. But what kind of monter sits up in his room all day and all night, doesn't eat, and nearly murders his friends when they talk to him, and yet can't remember any thing? I guess it's the same monster that never notices depression in the girl he thought he knew everything about. And this is the moment that I have realized what a wreck my life really is, and that it's only going to get worse.

                                                                        *  *  * 

My front door is wide open, and i could see that from the bush across the street. I walk straight in. Vivid memories of the day i walked through Shawny's front door come flooding back. I can feel the tears welling up in my eyes, but blink them back and bite my lip. Be strong I tell myself as I walk up to my room where i see my mother sitting, waiting for me. 

One deep breath in and out and the chaos starts.

                                                                        * * *

'What were you thinking?!" my mother screams at me at the top of her lungs.

"I-I don't know..." I mumble under my breath. My mom tends to scare me quite a bit when she's mad.

"You could have killed him! Right here in your bedroom, your best friend would have been lying here, dead! I can't believe this! You have been acting up so much lately, but i never thought it would come to this." I can hear the furry in her voice.

"You don't understand mom."

"No son, you're right. I don't understand. So enlighten me!" 

"Fine! Shawny mom. I loved her, she killed herself. Chaz hated her, and I dealt with it. But now that im trying to help Shawny's family and myself  by getting to the bottom of this, he keeps telling me that she never knew i exsisted and that i meant nothing to her. He was egging me on mom. He knew what he said stung, so he said it anyway. He had it all coming."

'That doesn't mean you almost kill him with your bare hands!!" she coninues shouting even after I thought i gave a reasonable explanation. She eyes are welling up, and the tears began streaming down her face like a river.

"Whatever mom." I say as I storm out of the house once more. Looks like it's a night on the street for me.