Unmarked

Part II

I walked into school the next day with a fake smile. My locker wouldn't open and I was five minutes late to class. My week was going absolutely great, wasn't it? The English teacher didn't even look up as I walked to my seat. "Nice to see you back, Ms. Brinkley." 

I force a smile back, "You too, Mrs. Niece." I ignored the whispers I could hear behind me and took out my notes. It was going to be a long day.

I thought my morning classes were terrible, but it was nothing like lunch. I had a million people, some that I didn't even know, coming up to me asking about my nonexistent Blaze. Countless "Where is it," "Congrats, Malone," and my favorite, "Well, we know you won't be M-alone!" I'm so done with life right now. The group of people I sit with pestered me a bit at the beginning of the day, but they quickly moved onto other things when they realized I wasn't going to tell them anything.

When one thirty rolled around, I almost sobbed in relief. I signed out in the office and walked to my mom's old Honda Accord. I was definitely nervous about what we were going to find out, and she looked anxious as well. I fiddled with the radio for fifteen minutes. She finally slapped my hand away and we jammed to Taylor Swift for the rest of the ride. Sometimes you just have to shake it off. We pulled into the parking lot and my stomach sank. I had a horrible feeling that the next time I walk out that door my life would be completely different.

The waiting room was the stereotypical doctor's office waiting room, with beige walls, cushioned chairs, and magazines that no one wants to read. It also had some small TVs on a old channel that I didn't know existed. The office was behind schedule, but when isn't it? Our wait ended up being about twenty minutes. The doctor finally rushed us into a small room and asked me what was wrong. I told him about how yesterday was my birthday but how I didn't find a Blaze anywhere. He got whiter and whiter as I explained and the expression he had when I was finished scared me a little. He told me that he needed to talk to my mother in private and I thought about throwing up; it must have been really bad if he couldn't tell both of us at the same time. She and the doctor got up to talk and closed the door. I tried to listen through the door, but all I could hear were muffled voices.

The doorknob turned suddenly and I jumped back into my seat, trying to act natural but probably failing. My mother picked up her purse and pursed her lips. She turned to me and cleared her throat. "Malone, I want you to know I love you and that this is what's best for you. Please don't hate me." 

The doctor suddenly grabbed my arm and my mother turned the other way. The doctor called in some other nurses that took a hold of me and started dragging me toward the door opposite of the exit. My mother walked to the exit, purposely not looking back at her screaming and cursing daughter.

"Mom, why are you doing this? What's wrong with me? Where are these crazies taking me? Why won't you answer me?" I was crying now; I couldn't believe she had just let these nurses take me away, who knows what they are going to do to me?

As I thought about this, I was suddenly filled with a burning rage, and just as my mother was opening the exit door, I screamed, "I hate you, you know that? You lied to me, you told me everything was going to be okay! You lied to me!"

She turned around then, and tears were making tracks down her cheeks, I love you. Though she whispered it, I read her lips, and snarled back, "I don't care!" She walked out the door.

I don't care that she loves me; she obviously doesn't love me enough.