love?

pain.

that's all I have left. I cant keep fighting with myself. this battle is not going to work out as best as I think it could be . my failure is inevitable. "shes awake!!" I hear coco say "what-" I try to say but my voice ceases to go on "you stopped breathing and kept mumbiling words that didn't make sense. I didn't know what to do so I just brought you here." she tells me as I nod and once again look up at the flickering white light. as close as I get I just get stuck in this damn hospital. am I even making any sense? my body is slowly going numb as the doctor gives me the pain meds but that wouldn't be new. I have to escape this I cant go on these dreams are becoming real I cant I don't want this to happen I need an explination. am I really sleeping or.. I don't know anymore. notafter tino took me in as one of his daughters and got me into that  srupid sex club. I cant even remember the last 2 guys who paid for me. but I did meet coco and she is always there for me.

she walks to the rooms bathroom and I look at the desk next to me and I grab the rose in the vase next to me but the second I grab the rose the light stops flickering but once I set it down the lights flicker and not just the one. I pick it up once more and I come to a conclusion after the lights went out after ther 50th time putting the rose down. ive got be be pure, clean and not dirty and mistreated but how? whats done is done. I lay back down with the rose folded acroos my arms as if I was in a coffin. what I my life is a dream? if so I need to wake up and get out of these lives of others. the rose thorn then pricks my finger and blood gushes out. I see a white figure grabbing my hnd and pulling me towars rhe door. then I see another figure but this one looks like a sillouete. the dark one is pulling me towards the floor. I then hear someone locking coco in trhe bathroom and my daydream fades. "JESS HIDE BEFORE THEY TAKE YOU!!!" I hear coco scream as I hide under the bed I then hear a gunshot and a body thud to the floor "NO!!!!" I scream and begin crying as my ankles are pulled from under the bed "ah, you must be Jessica Pauley. time to go toots." a man says holding me by my waist over his shoulders. "where exactly are you taking me??" I ask him as he smacks my ass. "shut your mouth whore" he tells me as he opens a limo door and throws me into the backseat. "well well, looks like it was on the menu." a male voice says "mister 100 dollar Cosmo??" I ask "Yes indeed" he tells me as I begin to ask why but he cuts me off "because I can and your working for me now. you killed my second best man and this is how you will pay me back" he tells me grabbing the 100 dollar bill out of my left bra cup. "this is a starting fee." he tells me putting the bill into his wallet . "how much do I owe you?" he then begins to laugh "well to put it correctly I paid him a total of $1,000,000,000 so doubling that and then the cost of a new one would cost about um... $3,000,000,000 and a tax of your outfits and choreography coach would be about $20,000,000,000. so $23,000,000,000. your not leaving for awhile." he says

he then pushes me off of the seat and onto the floor and opens his legs. "first dance" he tells me as he forces me to do the unspeakable *(okay I do have 13 year olds reading this so I'm not going to far into graphics plus the older ones know what happens so...yeah lets move on to 20 minutes later)*

I wake up to be pushed out of a car and into a building that reads "the cherry blossom" "you own this place?" I ask shocked. "yes the number one burlesque bar in all of the u.s. and you were surprised why?" he asks me I then shrug and he places me in a room titled "new recruit" "don't worry you will get a different room once we find a new girl." he says shutting the door and leaving. I then see a note laying on the outfit that says "first dance you did at the other place lets go 10 mins to get ready"

I then get ready and go on stage. *( play take it to the limit by hinder here. you don't have to but it makes it more entertaining)* I then do my dance hips moving side to side. 100 bucks every turn I make. my outfit barely clinging to my body my waist sucked in so tight I'm surprised I'm still breathing. let alone dancing I then sit onto a chair and do a simple chair dance then push it to the side. a few moves later and once the song ends I'm at the end of the dance stage and pushing a guy off of my thighs. if only I could be this confident and sexy out of work. I take a mans scotch and down it and throw the glass back to the crowd it shatters once it hits the ground. pulling ties, teasing men and dancing on a pole making 2 grand a dance just on tips how nice is this? I start to walk backstage *(if played the song it fades out)* pulling my ponytail out and shaking my hair leaving messy straining curls down my face and the upper part of my back. I pull out the tips out of my various body hiding places and count them on the way to my room. I'm almost close to the door when someone stops me. "what do you want 100 dollar Cosmo?" I ask him "the names ray and how much did you make doll?" he tells me. "2 grand" I tell him as he opens my room door and closes the door behind him. he grabs my money and takes 1 grand. "as you know I take half." he says as I keep backing up and he keeps following me as I end up pinned to a wall. "look.. um.. I need some sleep I have 9 dances tomorrow" I tell him "well first how about a drink?" he asks handing me a drink before I can even reply. "yeah how do I know its not spiked?" I ask him "oh dear lord." he says taking a gulp of my glass. "see? not spiked. your not that high up princess. and if I decide to sleep with you, you couldn't refuse I'm the boss okay doll." he tells me as he leaves with both glasses in his hands I thought that was my drink?" I ask him "yeah and I thought you weren't going to kill my 2nd best man." he says walking out

well shit. I then begin to take my makeup off and slowly but cautiously take off my waist clincher and outfit. I then put it into the closet but see the white blood stained outfit in a bag on the floor of the closet. a note reads "work to pay your debt." I then move the outfit into the closet and close the doors. I lay on the bed staring at the alarm clock on the right side of my bedside table with a glass of water in front of it blurring the numbers. I move the water to the side and see that the time is 11:45 well better get some sleep before ray notices I'm not sleeping. "goodnight new life. I hope you don't screw me over like you did last time." I then sigh and fall asleep