Still Around (A Camren Fic)

chapter 4

Camila's POV :

Ally's fallen asleep in my lap 30 minutes ago, her soft breathing audible over the voices of the Disney characters playing on TV.

Mani and Dinah are aslo asleep in a heep of blankets on the ground, empty bags of chips and popcorn forgotten next to them as they sneeze away.

My head has been going crazy in these 30 minutes, trying to assimilate all of the information and events that I had no time to dwell on in the past hours.

I ususally choose to just ignore some events when my head becomes too full and just kind of...shove them in a drawer in the back of my mind and lock them up safely till I feel like my head is ready to process everything.

And right now, my head is processing. Too much.

Overthinking does kill.

Before another tornado of thoughts can sweep through my mind again, the vibrations of my phone on the coffee table bring me out of my speculations.

I quickly grab it, expecting my mom and already planning on telling her I'm sleeping at Ally's, but the 11 digit number displayed on my screen catches me off guard. Very off guard.

I shouldn't answer.

But my stupid hand just moves by itself without my commend, hovering over the green answer botton.

Well then shit.

i should hang up.

Do I hang up?

Shit shit shit

I press the phone to my ear...

"H-hello?"

A raspy voice at the other end of the line chuckles nervously before saying in a sing song voice :

"It's me" (a/n ugh i couldn't resist I'm sorry)

Jesus christ...did she seriously just make an Adele reference?
Same old Lauren.

I can't even help the chuckle that escapes my lips at the lame, overused joke. A chuckle that quickly dies out when I remember the situation at hand.

She seems to sense my silence, because after a moment she takes a deep breath, clears her throat and says :

"I, um- we should talk, Camz"

Camz.

The nickname makes a round of nausea surface in my stomach, and my mouth goes dry.

"Don't call me that" I whisper, not trusting my voice enaugh in full volume.

"I- I'm sorry it just...slipped".

Silence again.

"We should talk, Camila"

Talk? After what? Months? She just leaves and comes back out of nowhere thinking she can just talk things out?

"Camila? Please, I just- I just want to explain-"

"There's nothing to explain Lauren!" I say more loudly than I intended.

Wincing at the loud volume, I clasp my hand over my mouth and wiggle myself from under Ally, making my way to the front porch.

"Look Camila, I know what I did was a douchebag move okay?! I know I'm a shitty friend, a shitty person, but I just- god! I want to, I need to, explain myself". Her voice is desperate, frustrated, and I can practically hear the self-loathing in her words.

I hesitate.

A part of me just wants to forgive her.
Put everything behind us and just get back to the way things were before.
God knows I need my friend back. Lauren was the closest thing I had to a sister besides Ally, and we always had a special bond.