Not (Complete)

Chapter 3

---Kyle's pov---

I nod in class. I copy the notes on the board, even if I don't read them or know what they mean, I copy them.

I sigh and put my pencil down, why can't I stop thinking about him?

I want to.

I really want to stop thinking about him. I even know I shouldn't be thinking about him, but I can't help it.

I can't even stop thinking about him long enough to take my fucking math notes.

I rub my temples and close my eyes. Why can't I just be normal?

Why do I have to be in love with my best friend?

Couldn't I just, be a normal teenage boy? Who likes to play video games and talk about girls.

It's so unfair.

He won't even like me like that if he was gay! Who would like someone like me?

Ugly red hair and too pale skin. I'm not muscular or attractive in any way. Plus, Stan's way above me on any scale on looks or popularity.

I wish I'd just stop having these feelings and thoughts about him already.

I already know he doesn't - and won't - like me like that. Ever.